Blood Whistle

That's it. I'm sick of all this meme bullshit that's going on in the internet right now. Creepypastas deserve much better than that. Much, much better than that.

I should know what I'm talking about. I myself commissioned a genuine 2spooky4me story in Fiverr for 5 bucks (that's about 20 pages) and have been re-reading with it for almost 2 years now. I can even scare spam bots with my story.

Creepypasta authors spend years working on a single story and write it up to a million words to produce the finest stories known to mankind.

Creepypastas are thrice as engaging as copypastas and thrice as memorable for that matter too. Anything a copypasta can do, a creepypasta can do better. I'm pretty sure a creepypasta could easily scare the most stoic critic with a single story.

Ever wonder why literary critics never bothered reviewing creepypastas? That's right, they were too scared to criticize the authors and their scary stories. Even in 2010, internet reviewers targeted the authors with creepypastas first because their 2spooky4me was feared and respected.

So what am I saying? Creepypastas are simply the best stories that the world has ever seen, and thus, require better stats in the Google search algorithm. Here is the stat block I propose for Katanas:

100-100000000 words or more
colorful use of vocabulary and horrific imagery
Top 10 best stories on the internet
4-5 star reviews
Praise of the author and their hard work
Do not include damn dirty trolls and haters

Now that seems a lot more representative of the scary power of the creepy pasta in real life, don't you think?

tl;dr = Creepypastas need more recognition on the internet, see my stats

 

You guys want me to submit these to the Trollpasta Wiki?

 

Do it.

 

You want me to credit you guys, or should I just say "the writer of this Trollpasta wishes not to be identified"?

 

I'm OK with that silly little short story I wrote being on that wiki.

("ToroidalBoat" or "TB" - whichever works better - is OK as credit)