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Legal Jail Letters (ITT: More Evidence Chris Nuttier than Squirrel Shit)

Discussion in 'CWC Discussion' started by PsychoNerd, Jan 25, 2022.

  1. NAITCHA BAH

    NAITCHA BAH 16-time World Champion

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    God, I hate to sound like a megaween, but what if Persona 5 inspired The Merge instead of Hyperneptune Whateveritscalled?

    And honestly, Kingdom Hearts isn't too far away from Sonichu: a self-insert joins forces with a bunch of Fandom that cross over, then the self-insert becomes a super-powered Mary Sue and battles nonsensical that is far divorced from the original fandoms that inspired it, to the point where the plot makes no sense and is being decided based on whims with no real follow-through.
     
  2. The Scrunkly

    The Scrunkly would YOU scrunkly the when?

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    I don't think it could have. That would involve all of the cartoon characters being born from humanity's collective thoughts, while Chris believed that cartoon characters existed for real in other dimensions. Also, it's made explicitly clear in Persona 5 that beings from the metaverse (except maybe shadows) aren't actually sentient, they're like characters in a dream. Although, he'd probably find it easier to justify his belief since I guess "I can access the collective unconscious, which has all of the fictional characters I like, and it will (or could) merge with reality" sounds a bit less crazy than "our physical universe is about to collide with another physical universe which has like 500 different cannon fictional worlds all in one and all artists and writers have a psychic uplink to this universe that they just don't realize"

    Still, if that happened, I wonder how he'd react to P5R's new plot arc. That's really interesting to think about.
     
  3. Cyan

    Cyan #00FFFF Staff Member B& AF, Fam Moderator

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    Somebody finally put my problem with that series into words.
     
  4. Congratulations

    Congratulations You like? Staff Member Moderator

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    Feels weird to think that it was only a different internet history that could have resulted in Chris making sorachu comics
     
  5. Anya

    Anya Heh Administrator

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    I thought this was a typo at first, and then I realized it wasn't and this was my reaction:
    ohgodohgodohgod.png
     
  6. Cyan

    Cyan #00FFFF Staff Member B& AF, Fam Moderator

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    I'd like some elaboration. What different internet history?
     
  7. Anya

    Anya Heh Administrator

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    In a different timeline, Chris would be making terrible Kingdom Farts/Disney OC's rather than terrible Sonic OC's.
     
  8. Cyan

    Cyan #00FFFF Staff Member B& AF, Fam Moderator

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    IDK that sounds like it would be more fun to riff than Sonichu.
     
  9. Ms. Mowz

    Ms. Mowz My likes mean absolutely nothing!

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    I feel like comparing Sonichu to Kingdom Hearts is giving Sonichu way too much credit. At the very least, Kingdom Hearts has decent enough gameplay to have an unironic fanbase (that isn't just "NOTICE ME, SEMPEI" weenery), even if the plot is a confusing mess that has definitely made Walt Disney roll in his grave.
    On topic: even if Chris has played Persona 5, any theme or message would have flown over his head. Not even just because of the complex themes in that game (when compared to Pokemon). Though I'm pretty sure Chris would have gotten triggered by the presence of Mara and never touch the game again.
    To be fair (kind of), there's a lot of dumbasses that missed the point of Persona 5's overall message. You just have to look at the 13 year old kids that pretend to be Phantom Thieves sending out calling cards to Donald Trump, competitive Smash players, Game Freak, Nintendo, and possibly Vladimir Putin.
     
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2022
  10. Anya

    Anya Heh Administrator

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    wotakoi-processinglag.png

    Wut.
     
    ToroidalBoat and Ms. Mowz like this.
  11. Ms. Mowz

    Ms. Mowz My likes mean absolutely nothing!

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    ToroidalBoat and Congratulations like this.
  12. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    I think the mysterious autistic appeal of the blue "WAY PAST COOL" hedgehog was too much to be ignored by CWC in any timeline where CWC is autistic in, and where Sanic is a thing.

    And if CWC was somehow not interested in the consumerism-friendly corporate mascot cartoon hedgehog, I doubt the other interests would combine and stick like Sanic and monsters of the pocket making "Sonichu". Not even "Bionic" got to the level of "still rockin' in [his] head!" like a certain hybrid "summoned" that fateful day.

    And now Chris thinks he's Christ and a fusion of Sonic and Pikachu, while in jail for "healing" Barb.
     
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2022
    Congratulations and Ms. Mowz like this.
  13. The Scrunkly

    The Scrunkly would YOU scrunkly the when?

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    400px-JailArt4.jpg

    "This drawing was made while Christine was being held in Orange County Jail.

    This pen-on-paper masterpiece features Sonichu doing one of his most powerful moves, Chaos Control. Christine intended to capture the power of the move through the aura drawn around Sonichu, radiating energy.

    This framed picture is autographed, authentic, and drawn on prison scrap paper."

    -Praetor, on Magi-Chan Sonichu Chaos Controls

    Oh look, another mistake! That's Magi-Chan, not Sonichu. It's really sad, honestly. These guys are probably the closest thing to friends Chris has at the moment, (or maybe they're even the closest allies he'll have ever again) and they can't even pretend to care about the ideosyncratic religion Chris has basically devoted his life to.

    Also LOOK AT THAT HAND GODDAMN
     
  14. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    Chris thinks the recolor rodents work with chaos?

    Sounds like heresy.
     
  15. Henry Bemis

    Henry Bemis On an eight-hour tour of a graveyard

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    "Chaotic" is in the Combo's name.
     
  16. Ms. Mowz

    Ms. Mowz My likes mean absolutely nothing!

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    Chaos Control is from Sonic. It's one of Shadow's signature. The word chaos shows up frequently in the Sonic series (Chaos Emeralds, Chao, and Team Chaotix, to name a few examples). Though I think in the case of Sonic, it might be due to (the Japanese based) Sonic Team at Sega picking an English word they thought sounded cool.
     
  17. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    I still think "Sonichu" lore reeks of heresy.

    (even before CWC got the delusion of godhood)
     
  18. PigaDgrifm

    PigaDgrifm For every problem there's a Final Solution.

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    Do we have any confirmation that these new Praetor drawings are even TRUE and HONEST?
     
  19. Congratulations

    Congratulations You like? Staff Member Moderator

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    Ngl, if it is genuine then Chris's artistic ability has improved slightly. Only Slightly though
     
    Ms. Mowz likes this.
  20. Minimal Effort

    Minimal Effort Bring out your dead.

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    But not for long, Disney has a habit of unleashing the lawyers if something that barely resembles there property making money.