Chris faking the Dimensional Merge

I haven't been able to watch it since I have Christmas shit to do with family, but...

Apparently Chris has been putting his homemade transformers toys on store shelves, taking pictures, and claiming that the toys are "morphing into CWCville products" and that this happening in retails all across the world.

I think he's trying to do a quantum thing or something. Like there's a lot of faux spiritual bullshit that claims if you believe something hard enough quantum physics makes it a reality, I believe he might be trying to gaslight people into bringing the merge closer via a poor understanding of science..

Or he could just be knowingly lying and trying to start a Mega Church or something

 

What a freak and jerk, CWC is!

 

Nah, it's obvious the forces that be are trying to deny the power of our CPU goddess. To deny the power of the one true god is to just keep everyone in the dark. It's worse than stuff like Roman emperors killing Christians and the Demiurge trying to keep us in the dark.

 

God I hate the fucking Demiurge and I truly hope the world beyond is as glorious as it seems when I'm on shrooms.... Free flowing energy able to shape itself and the world around it how it wishes.

Anyway, I've since had a chance to watch the video. I will say that it is somewhat impressive Chris was able to make boxes that kinda look like the real thing (even if the characters depicted look like typical Sonichu characters, so, like shit. I wonder what store he tried this shit in.

I know he made covers for Sonic Boom: Rise of Lyric that "fixed" Sonic's arms and then Best Buy charged him with shop lifting over if I recall correctly. Didn't think you could get charged with shoplifting, but apparently "defacing property" counts as stealing it somehow?

I wonder if anyone said anything to him when he did this shit. If Wal-Mart probably, if Target probably not. (Target will actually pretend to ignore your shop lifting because if you think you got away with it you'll do it again. Why? You steal enough merch in a small enough amount of time they get to charge it as a felony.)

 

I just want the demiurge to quit trolling us so I can be what I am in vidya: a true and honest parkour marine when I try to kill bad guys in COD before going home to my military wife Meryl and her boyfriend John Cena.

 

You've just reminded me of this cursed image you've made a while back.

(I still stand by my statement that Yaldabaoth / The Demiurge is more Chris Chan's style than Jesus.)

 

Don't speak blasphemy, it's one of the many great forms of our CPU goddess.

Serious note,Chris honestly would fit the mold of Demiurge if given actual omnipotent power.

 

I think I'd prefer him to whoever is running the show now.

Shit would still be fucked, but at least some of us could be anime girls and cartoon hedgehogs with magical powers.

 

In all seriousness, nah. Our OC's would come beat us up. I'd post the gif but the only source was Twitter and its owner privated.

Said image was basically this Nutshack GIF with "my oc's coming to beat me up after the dimensional merge."

 

If this happened, I would literally transform into Jacket, and be in the top 10 of the FBI's most wanted list.

Oh and Fox Mulder and Dana Scully would be chasing me around the globe to no avail. Then shit gets chaotic when they find me in urban Japan at one point and it's like a real life Yakuza game.

 

Meanwhile, whatever California is with OC's and fiction, I'd at least would get shot by a Terminator while caught in a drive-by between a gang in green and a gang in purple.

 

If I know the internet like I think I do, it will be street gangs full of My Little Ponies killing each other while spreading love and tolerance, because they think the other side isn't loving and tolerant enough. Both sides will also be incredibly racist and use Nazi imagery.

The Ponies that aren't racist and actually are wholesome will look like creepypastas.

This reminds me...

I actually fell asleep listening to let's play, as I do, and my fucking youtube decided that half-way through that it needs to show my unconcious body a Let's Read of the entirety of Sonichu.

Now this only a problem for me because I've trained my dream awareness, so I can regularly participate in and remember my dreams. Shapeshifting is something I've been working on in dreams because it's my wildest fantasy.

Unfortunately outside influences do interrupt my dreams, which is why I choose let's plays carefully; a monotone voice coupled with a dark atmosphere is just the perfect white noise.

Well because Sonichu is blasting through, I'm interrupted from my dream that I barely remember now and now my dream is suddenly about some random black guy showing me his comic book about Bananasaurus being friends with Punchy Sonichu.

I get up to go to the bathroom, only to find I'm still in the dream. I know this because somehow while going to my bathroom I find myself in the middle of a busy street where some kids from school hang out and played fighting with realistic toys and costumes/

What's even weirder, they were contextualized as kids from school, but they were adults that I didn't know and the "school" was some weird throne room I've never actually seen before with doors on the left and right leading to toys, costumes, and weapons.

Then I someone accidentally turned into Donald Trump and went to go campaign for the 2024 Election with my running mate Elon Musk.. Then I ran into a college campus where Joe Biden (Who apparently is running instead of Harris) was campaigning and so were my bois. I got free food from the Republicans because I'm their God King, and found another cafeteria with the Democrats and there was this pun on the sign that I don't remember. I made a note of my reaction, that I found it amusingly self-aware for the Democrats and odd that I could read a sign in a dream.

I ran into one of my siblings there who reminded me that I'm not really Donald Trump and we should get food together. While doing that I run into Joe Biden and the Real Donald Trump and ask them for help. They explain that I'm not Donald Trump, but a faker and they could tell because the real Trump was wearing Red for Republicans and I was wearing Yellow.

Then I asked them which one they thought I was voting for, and both Biden and Real Trump pointed at each other. I laughed and say "Actually Trump's right, I'm voting for Biden!"

Eventually I went back to the costume department to change back only to find people talking about the Green Power Ranger.

Sleep is a hell of a drug

 

Don't forget degenerate as well when knowing the kinds of people that get attracted to it. Same with video games, anime, and furries. Actually, I can imagine at the very least the characters of the show being thrown into the loony bin or going the route of Kurt Cobain after seeing all the horrible clones they have that were made solely to appeal to the fetishes of their creators. Sonic will likely hold out better.

I can only hope a meteor OC would come down and kill us all.

 

- Given how many OCs revolve around sex and pleasure. I could see this happening.

 

When you consider how many OC's exist for the purposes of sex or how many could be an extension or self-insert of the author that also revolve around sex, yeh pretty much. Just add in established characters for them to fuck like A-Log and any cartoon woman as an example.

 

Or Julaaaaay. Just to really be innovative.

 

Ever play a game called Illbleed? It's one of those cases where it sucks as a game, but as a work of art it's absolutely beautiful. If it were a movie it'd have found success much more quickly, though couldn't be as ambitious.

It was an experiment, though one that failed, to create a new genre of survival horror called "Haunted House Adventure", where the stage itself is trying to kill you and your goal is to navigate it while trying to activate as few traps as possible. Combat is present, but minimal. Each stage has its own theme or gimmick meant to parody a horror movie or horror movie trope.

The game was made by insane people and actively strived to make as little sense as popular, imagine Chris' Random Access Humor, only instead of being painfully unfunny, it's actually frigging hilarious because although there's not really rhyme or reason it still works. Part of it is that it strives to subvert expectations, but not in a Rian Johnson "What if I did the opposite of what people want Last Jedi to be? Clever right? Oh, and I fucked up and now Rise of Skywalker has to basically be one giant retcon for the mess I made." way, but more in masterfully setting up patterns only to break them when you're used to them.

Now the only reason I'm bringing this up is because one thing about the game that I actually is the second-to-last stage (or last stage if you don't count the final boss as a stage in and of itself) is a parody of Toy Story.

"Ore, that's not a horror movie, are you sure you don't mean Child's Play?"

No it's about a cowboy toy who befriends a space toy while trying to become the favorite toy of some kid, definitely Toy Story.
Though the reason for that is because only the favorite toy can go to the Hell reserved for humans, and he needs to break into Hell to rescue his love interest from Zodick The Hellhog. (Yes, a parody of Sonic The Hedgehog is the boss fight. You can't damage him because he'll just re-collect his rings if you try... Unless you destroy all the rings before he picks them up again)



She is the only toy with no animations, she is constantly in this pose with her ass sticking out, and is named "Sexy Doll"

She is literally a sex object who exists only for the gratification of the player character, any criticism of the character is literally just describing the intnet.

And I just think that's amazing commentary on the state of female representation in gaming at the time, and one of my many reasons why I love Illbleed.

Sadly there are many "Sexy Dolls" in fanworks, except for the ones that think sex is evil, everyone must go by "They/Them" to smash the patriarchy, and anyone whoever gets horny is a "goon-rapist" which is all a madness of its own kind.

Sorry, I just felt like bringing this up because in the writing scene, there's what's called the "Sexy Lamp" test. Where you replace a female character in a work of fiction with the leg lamp from A Christmas Story and see if the plot changes at all... and here we have a game that comes as close as you can to literally doing that and I fucking love it for it. (For the record: There are cases where the gender of the "Sexy Lamp" is male, Hallmark movies are a great example, in those cases it's called the "Greek Statue" test)

Anyway, all this to say.. If the Dimensional Merge happens and we have "Sexy Dolls" shopping at the mall because "Women be shopping", I never wanna hear another fucking incel complain about shit. You still can't get laid when an overload of the female population is replaced with horny bimbos and I'm sorry, I don't even know what the fuck is wrong with you.

 

Now that I thought about it, I think the worst thing to could possibly come out of the dimensional merge (if it was even remotely real) would be those annoying, disgusting, brain dead infidels from all those horrible mobile game ads coming to life.

 

Like I said in other thread, that depends on the values the characters hold on becoming real. Fictional characters becoming real could get very chaotic either way. Like Riblob* becoming real.

* Riblob is a big fat glowy blue frog with neon green eyes who drinks spacetimes. I just made him up just now.

 

When I clicked I was thinking you'd mean the imbeciles from the commercials where everyone acts like it's Yu-Gi-Oh or some shit and having a certain power level in a game the whole world revolves around for some reason, somehow entitles you to preferential treatment in society.