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Legal Jail of Fail

Discussion in 'CWC Discussion' started by ToroidalBoat, Aug 5, 2021.

  1. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    Weens keep trying to do the stupidest crap, even with Chris in jail.

    They're as dense as Chris when they think they can get le epic ween or bring "Classic Chris" back.
     
  2. Judgesaturn507

    Judgesaturn507 rambling without substance

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    You'd hope that now that Geno's reaching present day they'd stop their bullshit. Sadly, people don't learn.
     
  3. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    I still think it's better to learn "Christory" by reading the CWCki instead of watching a documentary.
     
  4. Judgesaturn507

    Judgesaturn507 rambling without substance

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    Agreed. There's just something about the CWCki. I love its snarky tone, feels like a relic of the 2000's internet alongside Uncyclopedia and TV Tropes.

    I certainly would take it any day over the cesspit known as Erectile Dysfunction Encyclopedia Dramatica.
     
  5. Cyan

    Cyan #00FFFF Staff Member B& AF, Fam Moderator

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    Kinda wish I could mail this to him.
    https://voca.ro/11Tpkap6zWWb

    Edit: Not that I'm actually going to bother. Nobody can fix Chris. The thought of an AI pony trying sounds funny to me though.
     
  6. Skeletor

    Skeletor Skellington Justice Warrior

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    Some of the entries in the cwcki are hilarious. Brilliant writing.
     
  7. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    IIRC the CWCki was started because the ED CWC article was getting too long for every little tidbit. The founders also wanted it to be more serious than ED, and where "no shit is too minor".

    I think the earlier CWCki still had a tone more like ED though.
     
  8. Judgesaturn507

    Judgesaturn507 rambling without substance

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    The CWCki says that Chris is only charged with misdemeanor incest.
    The law in Virginia states:
    So why is Chris not charged with a felony even when his arrest details said that he was charged with 'incest with own child'?
     
  9. Very Honest Content

    Very Honest Content Formerly a niggo (???) Staff Member Moderator

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    They put him in under the more serious class of offense either by oversight or intentional pickleman operation of the booking entry software. Either way, the saga continuation odds just went up exponentially. With his over leveled adult autistic child legal luck enchantment, possibly contained in his medallion who can really tell these things, he may even end up with just a slap of the bent duck, we'll see....
     
  10. Anya

    Anya Heh Administrator

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    This sounds like the origin story of a JRPG villain.

    I'd play it.
     
  11. Minimal Effort

    Minimal Effort Bring out your dead.

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    He was charged with "incest with own child" because the system the jail used does not have "incest with own mother" as an option.

    I think the state may have also charged him with elder abuse as well, but I am not digging around to find that answer.
     
  12. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    Chris is such a lolcow that even the way he goes through the legal system is a lolcow.
     
  13. Judgesaturn507

    Judgesaturn507 rambling without substance

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    I think legally you can only spend up to a year in jail having not been found guilty of any crime. What are they supposed to do if they can't continue the case any further?
     
  14. ICanFeelTheCosmos0704

    ICanFeelTheCosmos0704 friend of little cat

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    IANAL but some people who are either lawyers or are familiar with the legal system have commented on KF

    since Chris is in custody and is a danger to himself due to his mental illnesses, then IDK the details but they're allowed to detain him until they conclude he's no longer a danger to himself, so he could get stuck in mental health treatment indefinitely

    here's the KF thread
    https://kiwifarms.net/threads/f-a-qs-about-jail-state-hospital-and-court.113466/
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2022
  15. Judgesaturn507

    Judgesaturn507 rambling without substance

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    That's honestly probably the best outcome.
     
  16. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    From "and I just won!" to "BEST BIRTHDAY EVER" to "DON'T CALL ANYBODY!" to "Jail of Fail" to Nuthouse Saga.

    The "Life of Fail" indeed.
     
  17. Very Honest Content

    Very Honest Content Formerly a niggo (???) Staff Member Moderator

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    It's called either "a jury trial," or a "plea bargain," which would circumvent a trial and move right to the punishment phase with only the asian judge. Either way, still plenty of time for CWC to quote the boss Transformers movie line, "I have nothing but contempt for this court," yet again in the Virginia state courts system, that's literally the only time I've ever slightly envied the guy, not sure why he wants to rerun that episode of the series in a later season but I guess the writers really have run out of ideas outside of re-staging old classics.
     
  18. ICanFeelTheCosmos0704

    ICanFeelTheCosmos0704 friend of little cat

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    the court Chris is in is a bench trial, which means the judge would act as jury (and obviously be held to a much higher standard than a jury of people taken off the street) - but yes, a plea bargain is most likely
    apparently the kind of case the court is handling is the most serious it can hear
     
  19. One Too Many

    One Too Many Sexual Orientation: Heavy Metal

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    I don't think will take a plea bargain even it is the best thing for him given the circumstances and evidence that is stacked ageist him, I don't think Chris is quite capable of admitting guilt and wholeheartedly believes he will get out scot-free with no further ramifications for his actions; in one of his letter he anticipated Joe Biden would give him a pardon (even though the president doesn't have that power in this case, the governor does).
     
  20. Anya

    Anya Heh Administrator

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    Rob Bell was practically begging them to take the plea bargain when the two of them ran over Snyder (RELEASE THE SNYDER CUT!) and Barb ended up blowing all of Bob's Life Insurance on legal fees to still get told she dun goofed.

    Chris has never once taken responsibility for everything and has blamed everyone else for all his problems; a behavior he picked up from Barb, (and probably Bob?) He's got an excuse for everything - (ie: God told him that it's ok to fuck his mom) - so I won't be surprised if he's held until he's competent to stand trial, if he's going to continuously refuse to take a plea bargain.