Descent's Elementary School Chastity Textbook.

Just reposting what I had posted originally on the Kiwi while it's still cached. To date this was the only thread I ever started on the farms. I'll post the text and pics exactly how it was originally, but I'll add a few footnotes for in jokes that might not make sense now.
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So I finally made a thread for this. I've shown it in chat several times, but here for all of you is the absitnance only "textbook" I was given in grade 7 (which ended up being the only thing resemebling sex ed. that I got in all my years at Catholic school). I'm only going to show the first few pages for now and give you guys some background. I say "textbook" because it's not even 50 pages including the front and back cover and random blank white pages (and oh fuck are there a ton of them). It says "Parent's Guide" on the cover, and I've seen the student's guide used on amazon, but hell if I remember getting one. You see, we were supposed to go over some stuff at school and some at home. What ended up happening was the teacher not wanting to discuss "such delicate issues" with us and expecting our parents to do most of the work, and our parents not wanting to discuss "such delicate issues" and expecting the school to teach us. Now, on to what will surely be a high quality book:

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Goddamn, I haven't even opened it up and already you can tell it's shit. There will be even worse drawings inside.

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(I skipped over our first random blank page)

There are eight drawings in this book and it apparently took three people with no talent to do them. And the photos. Oh god the photos that ended up in here. I ended up cropping a ton of these pictures because there was so much fucking blank space. So if you're wondering why the pages are all different dimensions, that's why.

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With ecclesiastical approval! I made notes and highlights awhile ago so excuse me if I point things out twice. One of them being that I got this book in 2000 when it was published in 1986. With no revisions inbetween.

Because if it was true during the Regan era AIDS panic it's still true now!

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There you go. That's what we're in for. All Most of it gold, all of it full of bullshit.

I don't think it counts as a chapter or section when it's less than one page long.

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"Chastity is integral to a happy, full and successful life." Didn't get that job you wanted? It's 'cause you had sex. Feeling down? It's 'cause you had sex. Feel a hole in your life because you don't have many friends? It's 'cause you had sex.

"Since marriage is a relatively distant future event for most teens...". Yeah, you'll notice that this book won't try to dissuade teens from marrying young, which is a big problem for people indoctrinated like this and something I've seen ruin the lives of people I went to school with. But whatevs, as long as they didn't have pre-marital sex right?

Oh yeah, and "Freedom of Chastity".

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'kay, I had to look up Familiaris Consortio and it's "a postsynodal apostolic exhortation written by Pope John Paul II and promulgated on November 22, 1981." So we have what was at the time a 14 year old "text book" referencing a 19 year old...thing.

"For this reason the Church is firmly opposed to an often widespread form of imparting sex information dissociated from moral principles. That would merely be an introduction to the experience of pleasure and stimus leading to the loss of serenity..." You guys all got hard looking at biology textbooks right?

That's it for now. It gets better (or worse) from here.

 

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Remember how good the 1950's were! Also, I love how random sections are in bold. It's like a Jack Chick Tract.

"What are our goals? The get them married before they get pregnant".
Oh, okay good. Get them married before they're ready or sure of the person they're with isn't a priority.

So I don't want to get too personal or weepy, but growing up and being told that I had three options in life (being a nun, being single and alone or being a parent) was a major reason why I was depressed for several years.

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"Since many of us don't remember the clinical names of our anatomy, a textbook can do a better job than we can". That is so depressing and probably true of the people who got this book. Fucking sad face :.(

"...commitment of Christian marriage..." LOL, none of that interreligious marriage nonsence. You stay with your own people.

"Children" and "genital arousal" should not be in the same sentence D:

"...Chastity enables us to develop the other skills needed in relationships and in successful marriages, such as the art of verbal communication". ...I..uh...I don't know. I don't fucking know.

"...we will enable teens to grasp the strength of our belief and accept it as their own." Nothing brainwashy about that.

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"Slang expressions or the language of the streets are inappropriate." That is the whitest fucking thing I've ever heard.

"Prudence suggests that we not overwhelm our youth with biological information." Remember, knowledge is bad. That shitty drawing (which apparently took three people to draw) proves it. You owe it to yourself to read the totally TRUE AND HONEST story they bring up that totally happened.

 

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"Sometimes their questions may seem like attacks on morals, but usually they are not." lol, god forbid you be questioned. That's basically a hate crime.

"...that need will be filled with the values of the street and locker rooms." That is my new favourite white people saying.

Young girls need to learn about dressing modestly, young boys need to learn about resisting temptation and getting wet dreams.

Offensive jokes and birth control are the same thing BTW.

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Society has gotten so bad we may need to take the Eucharist daily.

"sound biological information" and religion do not blend well.

"we can create a respect for sexuality in the next generation that can begin to eliminate the demand for abortion, pornography and teen contraceptive clinics. Dream big!" Where are these contraceptive clinics that target teens?

"It only takes a spark to get a fire going!" *insert joke about blowing up Planned Parenthood here*

"As parents, we already have the common sense that comes with age and experience." Ho ho ho ho ho. So I take it this was the 80's equivalent of starting a sentence with "AS A MOTHER..."

..."immature reliance on sensuality."

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OH NOES! NOT THE CONSEQUENCES OF PORNOGRAPHY! D: D: D: D:

"Unfortunately, with the recent developments in psychology and the focus on the self-justifing concept of 'self-esteem'..." I must have posted this a dozen times in chat. There's proof that I didn't make that line up.

That's it for now. I promise the pages get better, but so much of this crap is just repeating the same thing over and over again with bible quotes mixed in. That fish that's playing pokemon at the moment [1] could crap out a better textbook.
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[1] A shitty, dated reference to this https://www.twitch.tv/fishplayspokemon

 

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"The Catholic Church, as the universal Church... " lol

"This outlook is unrealistic today." Literally two pages ago the author was whining about how "God has not changed and 'eternal truth' means forever". Either shit is true through the ages, or you have to grow and adapt to soceity. One or the other.

"The official Church teaching is the only position we can afford to take." The use of the word "afford" seems really odd to me.

"authentic maturity" Okay, she's just making shit up now.

Also that drawing. Yeah, that's a real middle ground.

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"Humanae Vitae includes some of the most beautiful and prophetic writings on love, marriage and dignity that has ever been in print". I couldn't find a reaction pic that could truly show the face I made after reading that.

You can see I made notes on the page, but everytime god is referred to as "he" it's capitalized, but everytime the church is referred to as "she" it's lower case. Nice casual sexism there. Also the word "Here's" is capitalized for some reason.

Also also, under the Confidence Gained in Relationships with Others paragraph, you can see the author used a gender neutral word like spouse for all of the examples, except for the one about listening to a family member to see things his way.

"...and our love-relationships..." okay, she's definately making words up now.

Holy shit, those first two book titles at the end of page!

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D: D: D:

 

Sorry I haven't updated in awhile. Here's more pages than usual.

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A table of contents in the middle of the textbook for a seperate textbook. I have no fucking clue what any of this is referring to since we barely even did anything with these books. I do love the 1984esque language, "educational centers chosen and controlled by them".

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"PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT or ARE YOU A GREAT LOVER? Describes how to become a great Christian lover of God and His creation." There is nothing about that sentence that doesn't make me want to vomit.

"Reveals sin as an abuse of our freedom"

Also, at first glance I thought that really shitty drawing was about a white girl imagining herself as a black boy.

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"Distinguishes between the positive results of the practice of chastity and the natural consequences of sins against chastity." Well, that sounds fair and unbiased.

"...and many saints throughout history who have chosen chastity." Can anyone name a male saint who died protecting their virginity because the only ones I can think of are female ones? Women chose death over loosing their virginity, men ask God to "Grant me chastity and continence, but not yet."

Here's a larger scan of that brilliant drawing on the left

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Too lazy to explain my note at the top of the page. Go here

This was something I read on a blog and wasn't in this book, but that "family activity" picture reminds me of this fundie list of ideas for young adults to do in a group date (since two people on a date is a sin obviously). It was something like "Have an alphabet letter hunt. Go around the mall looking for each letter of the alphabet".

"Could the plot of the show have survived without the immorality?" No. What a retarded question. Moving on...
"How would you rewrite the plot to illustrate or reinforce Christian Values?" Very poorly and shoe horned in I imagine.
"Think of other ways there are to sell products (toothpaste, chewing gum, soft drinks) without relying on sex appeal." You guys remember the old toothpaste and bubble gum commercials we jerked off to as kids right?

No seriously, what kind of commercials are they thinking off?

"Discuss what human beings have in common with animals and what unique attributes God has given to us alone." This is a book for teenagers.

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Regarding attending a weekday mass: "If this means extra sacrifices (getting up early, missing a meal or adjusting a work schedule)..." Starving and missing work. Nothing unhealthy about that.

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"Discuss how enslavement to our bodily desires causes us to lose our freedom to choose."

"There are seven capital sins. Discuss how two of these, lust and gluttony, can lead us to more serious sin." Who calls the seven deadly sins 'capital' sins? Also, gluttony's kind of a random sin to bring in at this point.

"What does the virtue of modesty include? (Hint: a pure mind, clean speech, modest dress and virtuous actions)." Hint: you just gave away the answers.

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"Why should young Catholics develop a devotion to Mary and the Holy Rosary." Yes, growing up I heard many times from priests and Catholic teachers "No we totes don't worship Mary. We honour her." Stuff like this does not support their arguement.

 

Ooooooh boy are we about to get into the good stuff.

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FOR ADULTS ONLY YOU GUYS! It's a good thing the cwcki put in an over 18 rule [2], because I wouldn't want any impressionable teenagers to be harmed by these crude drawings.

"It may be good to seperate the boys from the girls and invite a priest to address these moral issues." What moral issues? Biology? And yes, it's important to keep boys and girls seperate. We wouldn't want them learning how the other sex's bodies work.

"...Not because your child should not know about certain sexual sins and abuses..." on the same page as biological drawings, and one sentence before "LET'S START THE BIOLOGY UNIT".

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"This chapter is designed to provide necessary information without overwhelming the young teen." That's some good writing there. That's almost Connor [3] levels of good.

"For that reason, it is recommended that Chapter Six be taught at home and not in the school or group setting." School's aren't for learning.

"The diagrams provided here are for you and your teen to use at home. They are purposely left out of the student text to avoid desensitization or embarrassment for the students in a classroom." ...I...I got nothing. Just... goddamn.

Maturity is an important term to know when talking about BIOLOGY.

'kay, I barely had any kind of sex ed in my life, so if our more learned members want to pick apart anything they got wrong, please do.

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I like how they left out Clitoris.

I'm sure you guys will be shocked to learn that oral sex play is a sin.

"It is a violation of chastity and a form of lust-using each other for pleasure".

"Every genitally arousing act must be within the framework of marriage and should culminate in the act of natural intercourse if it is to be a complete love-giving and potentially life-giving act." Spouses are never allowed to say "no" because it means you're not "love-giving".

Masturbation
AUGH YEAH [4]

"Masturbation is an immature and degrading act." You heard it hear guys. Stop diddling yourselves, it's degrading. Guilt your spouse into fucking you every time you get a hard on instead.

"The delicate topic of mastubartion is best discussed with a priest..." NO

"Some psychologists claim that masturbation is normal. This, however, does not mean it is right." Yeah, what do psychologists know? With their secular degrees and books and ideas about consent.

"Our Church teaches that 'masturbation is an intrinsically and seriously disordered act'."

"Teenagers, especially young men, may commit this offense due to weakness, immaturity or curiosity. It is important as a parent to guide them to a good confessor who will help them overcome this immature action." Take your young son to see an older man so he can tell him about jerking it.

"The habit of masturbation can bring serious psychological and sexual problems." YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT ELSE CAUSES THAT? Bronze age views about sex, gender roles and consent.

"...it can distort true sexual enjoyment later on in a marriage."

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"If a young man consciously does nothing to cause the erection, for example, chancing upon stimulating materials, there is no sin. If left alone, the erection will go away so masturbation is never necessary." I read this paragraph to my boyfriend. He just laughed and laughed and laughed.

"An excellent video discussion on this subject for parent and son, is Father Roberts Talks to Teens, available from Pax Tapes in St.Louis, Missouri." I understand that this is from the 80's and that there was no Wikipedia or Internet back then, but come the fuck on. There must be a better way to site sources and shit then just going "GO TO THIS VIDEO STORE IN MISSOURI".

"These materials can put the imagination in 'overdrive' and can bring on memories..."

"Although God designed the act to be pleasureable, pleasure is a side effect, not the goal."

"It cheapens human sexuality, even when used vicariously on T-shirts and bumper stickers." How do these people manage in the real world?
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[2] At the time, Null had just implemented a rule stating that new members must be over 18.
[3] Reference to an aspiring young novelist and author of the modern day classic "Redesigning Eva" on the forum named Connor.
[4] WHERE THE FUCK IS THE FATMAN AUGH YEAH SMILIE YOU FUCKING PLEEBS!?

 

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"In a world filled with contraceptives..." Condoms all up in this bitch!

"to plan children with fertility knowledge and self-control," Yes, because if there's anything fundies know, it's how women's bodies work. Also, the only thing more fun than waiting to have sex before marriage is continuing to wait after you're finally married, right?

"when we contracept, we defend ourselves against our spouse. He or she is seen as a threat." And chaperoning and physically monitoring your teenager when they're dating someone isn't defensive or treating the person they're interested in as a threat.

"Some people have taken on the contraceptive mentality in fear that they couldn't practice the self-control necessary to plan the right size family or that God would not provide for them as He has promised." Yeah, or they're trying to protect their physical or mental health. LOL j/k Mental health isn't real.

"Natural methods of family planning are not based on fear, but on faith in God..." Yeah, well faith in one hand and crap in the other and see which one you can routinely depend on more.

"The modern natural methods are highly effective, even during irregular cycles, menopause, or breastfeeding."

abortifacients [5] LOL that word has lost all meaning to me since so many people use it incorrectly.

"Besides being immoral, each artificial method comes with its own set of side effects....there is no need to suffer the side effects, inconveniences or sinfulness of birth control devices." Yes, because pregnancy has NO side effects or risks what so ever. Pregnancy is all about wearing bigger clothes and having weird cravings.

"Sterilization is a form of despair. It says: "I will never be able to control my sex drives to plan the size family I should have." Never mind the size family you want. That's being selfish.

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"I surrender my human powers of reason and will to my biology. The animal in me wins."

Homosexuality Oh goody. I'm sure this textbook from 1986 will be enlightening.

"A homosexual relationship is futile and can never be fulfilling." ... ... ...

"There is no unity or procreation possible in a sexual relationship between two people of the same sex." I just remembered the two lesbians I went to school with who had to deal with a ton of depression and bullying before they could finally admit "yes, I am gay, I need to stop pretending."

"As the secular media proclaims homosexual rights..." Now, I was born in 1987, so I'm not 100%, but I'm pretty sure the media "proclaiming" homosexual rights wasn't actually a thing.

"...corrects the false notion that homosexuality is "neutral of even good". Hoooooooooooooly shit.

"The homosexual tendency or urge, while not sinful in itself, is nevertheless a "tendency ordered toward an intrinsic moral evil and thus the inclination itself must be seen as an objective disorder". This kind of thinking has worked out wonderfully for people like Chris or Jace. [6]

"Homosexual persons are human beings, that are neither neutral or good capable of self-control, who could acknowledge this condition as a special cross given by God."

"Boys in their pre-teen years should have healthy relationships with men of character as role models. They need father's uncles, neighbors, scout leaders or coaches to admire." Sometimes the humour writes itself.

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"We can show them that it's all right to be different, if it means being Christian." You can be different, so long as you behave like 80% of the population.

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"Teenagers need to be hugged, just like everyone else. This may seem awkward at first, and you as a parent will need to take the initiative. We all need a pat on the back and a good squeeze once in a while." So we went from a chastity textbook to an instruction manual for aliens pretending to be humans.

Those three bullet points are the most first worldish problems I've ever heard. I half expected them to say something like "having yellow tab levis when everyone else has red tabs"[7]. Also, why is "to do homework" in quotes?

Also also, for someone who bitches about the evils of "secular media" the author sure does seem to think that life works like a cheesy sitcom.

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"One of the best times to talk is before bed at night. Vulnerability seems to set in at day's end. Yeah, there's nothing fucking creepy about that sentence.

"Our children's first feelings of attraction to a member of the opposite sex are an occasion to let him or her know this is normal and good, but to recognize those feelings for what they are-first attractions, not true love." The Duggar's and other Quiverful families would disagree since having attraction to someone you don't end up marrying is basically cheating on your future spouse and dating is just practice for divorce.
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[5] When I was copying and pasting this right now, my computer's spellcheck didn't recognize this as a word. Fucking LOL.
[6] Obviously this was before we knew Jace was fake :/
[7] uhh...I asked my boyfriend for help with a first world problem example high school kids might deal with and this is what he suggested :/

 

Sorry I haven't updated in awhile. I'm going to go ahead and finish off the rest of the book.

Hey guys! Let's fill out a questionaire. I really wish I had the student book right now.

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As you can see, my parent's didn't bother filling out (or even using) the book.

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"What is his or her greatest sorrow?" I like how poetic they make these questions.

I'm actually sad these questions are more boring than stupid. I feel like I've failed you all ;_;

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I thought group dating was just another word for double dating, but they listed that to. So how the fuck does group (as in more than six people) dating work? Aren't you just hanging out with friends at that point?

"Should you drink on a date (beer, wine, other alcohol?) Why or why not?" Well, since they gave this to us in 7th grade, and the legal age for alcohol consumption in B.C. is 19, and this is a book all about dating for teenagers, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say no because it would be illegal, date or no date. I'm actually a bit surprised that this book didn't insinuate that if you drink on a date you will get raped like a scarlett whore (although I'm sure plenty of parents wrote that in as the answer).

"Honest affection should express the depth of your relationship and not be based only on feelings. What kind of relationship is expressed in each of these forms of affection?" THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN!?

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Most of those questions should probably be given to the loveshys.[8] I'd love to see their answers.

"They need to be told that petting and intercourse belong in marriage." God, all I can think of is this blog http://kristinaskeeps.blogspot.ca/2009/02/obeying-6-rule.html

"Keep all of your clothes all the way on all of the time." I don't care how warm it is in the restaurant, keep your jacket on or you'll give your date a boner.

"Teens need to know that drinking and drugs are wrong...because your freedom to make good moral decisions is lost." Well that,and because it's illegal and can get people fired or ruin businesses if it's found out that minors were served. Also, one drink isn't going to fog your mind.

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"how he can be the leader on the date by keeping things under control" Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha fuck you

Oh my god the difference between the notes for boys and girls is hilariously depressing.

"how she can set the tone of the relationship by the way she acts.

how modesty is important in helping boys respect her.

how her body is as valuable as she wants it to be.

what responsibility she has in setting limits and how a well mannered boy will be grateful."

I love the random quote by a totally for real "16 year old girl". You don't need citations when you have THE LORD

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"Discuss the dangers of dates "alone at someone's house", or "just watching videos". Talk about the temptations privacy affords." I love the scare quotes around "just watching videos". Like the guy's going to invite a girl over to watch the latest John Hughes movie and then spring some surprise hard core porn on her.

"Encourage double dating and discourage steady dating." ... Why the holy fuck would you discourage dating the same person? Does she not know what steady means?

"Guide teens to set limits on affection" That has to be one of the most unhealthy sentences in this book.

"Highly emotional relationships drain energy and should be used in school, church and family activities." Yeah, you need to save your energy for standing outside clinics and screaming death threats at women.

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"It is important to meet the parents of your children's friends and discuss your values and expectations with them." Now, if this said "it's important to me the parent's of the people your child is dating" this would make sense, but why the hell would you have to meet every parent of your child's friends just to talk about your values and expectations? That's not realistic and is more than likely going to socially harm your child. Not every parent will share your morals. What do you do then besides break off your child's friendships?

"Some tell-tale signs of sexually active youth are such things as:

spending more time ALONE with one person." Why is alone CAPSLOCKED?

"showing less interest in other friends." Yeah, or maybe because teenagers are fickle and will drop friends for the stupidest reasons. But it's much safer to assume your teenager is having sex.

"Passion is the worst preparation for marriage." Cold indifference is the best way to go.

"A parent who gives a teen birth control information and materials has destroyed both reasons [fear of getting pregnant and not wanting to disappoint parents]. By encouraging sexual activity, they are in effect saying, Do it, but don't get caught." No they aren't. Maybe if you surveyed parents who teach safe sex to teenagers instead of surveying some unknown number of virgins you'd know. They're educating their children to make their own decisions. Education won't kill them. A lack of education will.

"If teens were told there would be no security systems or personnel in the shopping center next weekend, might there be an increase in shoplifting?" Okay, 1: These two things are nowhere near the same. One is educating, the other is not. 2: This assumes that people only follow the law because they don't want to be punished, not because they want to be good people. 3: WOW way to stereotype there. Change the word teen to any ethnic minority and try not to sound like a piece of shit.

"Giving teens birth control materials so they can continue to fornicate is like putting a band-aid on cancer." Cancer is only appropriate within marriage.

"Pregnancy is not a disease." If you don't want kids, then yes it is.

"Besides, the only 100% effective birth control is abstinence." Unless you get raped.

"Since contraceptive education was extended to teenagers, there has been an increase in promiscuity, venereal disease and a tremendous increase in teen pregnancies."

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I do not believe for a second that any of these suggestions came from real teenagers, pregnant or not.

"Although having an unwed, pregnant daughter is always a disappointment..." WOW. And if you're wondering if the book mentions sons who get girls knocked up being a disappointment, SURPRISE! they don't say that.

Blah blah blah we're about to get into the "every sperm is sacred" bullshit now.

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Complete with drawings of things that aren't people.

"If we as grandparents help raise the child, will this add confusion to the child's life?" Holy fuck, the amount of shaming pregnant teens and out of wedlock children is insane.

"The baby can enjoy the love, care and protection possible in a two parent home." Unless the baby given up for adoption is a minority or disabled. Anti-choicers seem to love ignoring that reality. Also, make sure it's a two parent couple adopting. Single parents adopting will probably end up killing the child or raising them to be atheists or something equally horrifying.

The pain and sacrifice of giving the child to a loving couple may be worth the better opportunity the child will have for a happier life." I had this big long thing written out, but since a certain Kiwi member [9] has made it hard to have a serious discussion about the pros and cons about adoption, I'll keep it quick. Women who give their babies up for adoption are more likely to suffer from depression and there barely any resources to help them cope because society expects them to be happy and go on with life. A couple girls I went to highschool with ended up giving their kids up for adoption shortly after graduating (because SURPRISE abstinance education didn't work for them). My best friend told me that one of them ended up morbidly depressed to the point that she would get triggered by even Pampers commericals. And I don't mean triggered in the SJW "I'm getting prickly wicklies" sense, I mean in the full blown meltdown, sobbing hysterically sense. And that's not even getting into the issues with white people adopting non white children.

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Oh look, another goddamn half page.

And now some book recommendations, or, more bullshit based on nothing.

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LOL at those last acknowledgments
And the back cover.

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[8]Hey guys, remember when loveshys were shitting up the kiwi? Don't know if it was still like that after I left.
[9] Connor had an irrational hate boner for the topic of adoption.

 

Is this standard for American sex ed?

 

I'm Canadian and went to a private Catholic school from grade 5-12. I don't know if the other Catholic elementary schools used the exact same book, but they would have learned the same basic lessons.

Or not learned. Like I said, neither the teachers or most of the parents actual taught the lesson plan.

 

Did the book work at increasing teen pregnancy at the school?

 

Went to a public charter school in Texas at the time I got sex-ed. We didn't have any books for it, just a parent who came in and pretty much spouted a lot of the same nonsense.

 

Well, Catholic means universal, so they aren't wrong on that one.

It's curious to notice how Catholic education was more strict in the US than in Italy.

 

Who reeeeee'd the most about the 2013 film Philomena, which was about the real life case of Philomena Lee, who had a fling with a lad in the 1950s in Ireland and was mewed up in a Magdalene Laundry and had her child sold by the Catholic church. Was it:

1. the Pope, or

2. Bill Donohue, of the American Catholic League.

Hint: It wasn't the Pope.

EDIT: I went to a fairly level headed school but with somewhat Christian overtones and I remember being given an RE textbook which had a double page spread (drum fill) on how pr0n was evil and claiming that so-called "Hardcore pornography regularly features torture, multiple rape, and the actual killing of women in screen in so-called snuff films." Ergo, you needed more Jesus.

I wish I could find a copy of this book, or even its name.

 

The last two times the Pope REEEEEd hard were:
A) The Kingdom of Italy taking Rome in 1870.

B) The Italian Communist Party (PCI) almost beating the Christian Democrats (DC) in post WW2 Italian parlimentary elections.

So yeah, I think that various associations are more likely to get angry/taliban over movies or sex ed than the Holy See itself.

 

I remember in grade 10 our religion teacher telling us that a snuff film was where they film a woman giving oral sex to a gun, and then getting shot in the head. So for years after that I thought a snuff film was only a snuff film if it was specifically that. It made several family guy-esque jokes I watched super confusing.

 

Wait, isn't that a scene taken from Beyond the Valley of the Dolls?

 

Just when I thought the onion of my high school years was at it's core, you just found another layer to peel off.

 

I remember watching an abstinence video in school where a girl told her boyfriend she was pregnant and he flipped the fuck out and beat her to death.

If you have sex you'll literally be murdered.