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Legal Jail of Fail

Discussion in 'CWC Discussion' started by ToroidalBoat, Aug 5, 2021.

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  1. Henry Bemis

    Henry Bemis On an eight-hour tour of a graveyard

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    I wonder how often Heilberg has dropped in, especially regarding that evaluation that's put everything on hold. Usually, when Chris starts feeling the heat, that becomes apparent in any communique.

    Then again, the Goddess/Jesus/Merge shit has given Chris so much ecclesiastical certainty, who knows how hot things have to get. And it's been much more than a weekend in the pokey by now, and those ended in genies with light brown hair in the hex-shaped sink.
     
    Last edited: Oct 28, 2021
  2. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    Seeing that Roger Rabbit movie could've been yet another "critical moment" that led to "Jail of Fail Chris".

    No movie --> no idea of Dimensional Merge?

    Speaking of, I keep thinking Chris was a little kid when he won the sweepstakes. But nope, he just turned 11.

    Maybe his mind age is still single-digit, rendering him like a little kid with a sex drive (very disturbing).
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2021
  3. king koi

    king koi Nobody cares, yo!

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    Chris might be very aware of it too. Might just be one of those situations where you just won't acknowledge it. Or the lie is so far in he believes it. Probably the hardest one to believe is the simplest. Dude's probably always been like this.
     
  4. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 19, 2021
  5. Skeletor

    Skeletor Skellington Justice Warrior

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    Sounds like he’s doing okay in jail.
     
  6. Kong

    Kong SCION OF LEGEND

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    I hope Chris becomes a prison ideological gang leader, but instead of getting people into white nationalism he gets them into whatever this fucking shit is.
     
  7. Skeletor

    Skeletor Skellington Justice Warrior

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    Honestly jail is probably great for his mental health. He is off the internet and interacting with real people.
     
  8. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    I don't know if Chris thinking he's Christ means his mental health is improving...
     
  9. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    This. If anything, I think his mental state has gotten worse. It's like I said before, I think Chris has finally snapped like a rubber band.
     
  10. king koi

    king koi Nobody cares, yo!

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    Wdym? Chris has always had messianic tendencies. Is quite the Christlike figure
     
  11. ICanFeelTheCosmos0704

    ICanFeelTheCosmos0704 friend of little cat

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    I wonder if he'll tard rage when he realizes that he won't be released for Christmas
    or that he isn't getting any presents, except for maybe a new Gideon Bible or something from a ministry that visits prisoners

    someone from KF said they had a family member in jail during Christmas
    they got a few slices of Oscar Meyer style turkey and some instant mashed potatoes with some gravy for dinner
     
  12. Cyan

    Cyan #00FFFF Staff Member B& AF, Fam Moderator

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    Write Chris a Christmas letter asking what Santa Claus brought him for his holy birthday.
     
  13. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    Chris has been used to getting LEGOs for Christmas since he was (physically) a little kid.

    This time is likely going to be different.
     
  14. Vexing Devil

    Vexing Devil pokes you for 4 whether you like it or not.

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    a friend clued me onto this


    tldw?: chris is still sending letters and getting replies apparently full of DBZ and islamic references
     
  15. Cyan

    Cyan #00FFFF Staff Member B& AF, Fam Moderator

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    The letters have been really boring, save for the one where Chris reveals that he's made no friends and has been antagonizing the "jerkops".
     
  16. Minimal Effort

    Minimal Effort Bring out your dead.

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    That will go over well at the trial.
     
  17. Kindred

    Kindred Your sins always comeback!

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    I really hope he does. After the shit he pulled he doesn't deserve a Christmas or any holiday for that matter.
     
  18. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat ¿qué?

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    If "Santa Clause" were real, he put Chris on the naughty list for sure.

    Of course if Chris still believes in Santa, he no doubt thinks he's on the nice list.
     
  19. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    So you're saying Chris is going to *demand* Santa bring a sweetheart to the jail for Christmas?
     
  20. NAITCHA BAH

    NAITCHA BAH 16-time World Champion

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    "Santa, I KNOW I've been bad this year. Please accept my heartfelt-to-sincere apology and BRING me a boyfriend-free girl. If you don't, I can ASSUME you're a HEARTLESS BASTARD like the damn TROLLS!!"
     
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