Blood Whistle

Blood Whistle is a spectacular failure of a creepypasta, even by that genre's standards, featuring nearly every terrible cliche from these type of stories taken to comical levels on top of purple prose almost on the same level as "The Eye of Argon". TBH, even though I'm posting this this, I'm not going to bother with MST, because I feel that no commentary could top the hilarity of this. At the most, I will highlight some of the particularly lulzy parts with bold.
So let's get on with the show!

FOREWORD

What the Blood Whistle looked like.

This is the recorded blog of a college student who was playing a modified version of Super Mario Brothers 3 on his computer. Shortly after submitting the last entry, he committed suicide in his dorm room.

 

JUNE 5TH, 2012
A friend of mine recently sent me what he claims to be a scary Super Mario Brothers 3 hack that he wanted me to try out (because he didn't have the courage.) I started this blog to record my progress through the game. He got this from a site that's no longer active, and I've seen some pretty scary occurrences with emulator games before. Just look at BEN. All of that aside, however, there was something definitely off about this ROM. Its title was SMB3:BW. Anyhow, I won't play any today as I'm quite busy with college work and such, but I will definitely start tomorrow.

 

JUNE 6TH, 2012
I played some of the game today. Obviously my friend was misinformed, as I have played all the way through 1-3 and have found nothing irregular. All of the sprites, levels, and sounds didn't have a fluke to their name. Wait… A secret! That must be how you have to unlock it! I swear you guys, I'll find the warp whistle tomorrow and see what creepy secrets this game has to hide. Look for tomorrow's post, it won't disappoint. Maybe this will explain what the BW in the title stands for…

(Yeah, this pasta starts off slow, but trust me, it gets a lot stupider very quickly.)

 

Honestly, the people at Oneyplays made a better creepypasta with the Gameboy Advance SP Blue Edition and they were literally doing it as a shitpost

 

JUNE 7TH, 2012
I wish I hadn't unlocked that secret. This game will be the bane of my existence. I'll try as best as I can to explain what happened and what will certainly entail. I don't know if any of you will believe me, but this sick mockery of one of my childhood favorites must be exploited and never be seen by the eyes of any other breathing man on god's green earth. And Todd (what I'll call my friend for the sake of privacy and possibly security), DO NOT send that link to anyone else. You'll see why below.


My first encounter with the Blood Whistle.

I entered the castle stage. Knowing its only secret was the warp whistle, I disposed of a dry bones before donning a raccoon tail. With a running start I was flying above the stage until I hit the secret area. My whole life before I hit up on my arrow keypad was completely different. I was happy. I was normal. I could wake up in the morning recognizing my own reflection, being absolute about my safety. Now it's lies. All lies. I know that as of what happened today, my life will become an infernal hell in which every day will be a futile struggle to retain my own sanity. After finishing this wretched collage of electronic dejection, I will embrace death like a long lost lover with open arms. Now to get on with what had come to pass.

 

The blocks that lined the wall were a gloomy albeit polished obsidian black. Mario's skin now had a grayish tint to it, but that wasn't what was wrong with that picture. The music was a sped up version of the normal "bonus room" theme. Toad's skull was cracked open and profusely bleeding, spilling blood onto the floor and making the room slippery like an ice stage. His mouth was also agape and spewing blood onto the floor. The blood had an eerie, reflective quality that SHOULD have been graphically impossible for an 8-bit game like Mario 3. I walked up to him to see what it is that he might say. What he had to offer is this:

Blood Whistle.

HEAR ITS CRY.

I then ran towards the chest to see its contents. The chest was drenched in reflective, realistic blood of the same type emanated by the orifices and exposed cranium of the poor little mushroom-headed fellow. Pressing onward, I ran through it to discover its dark secret. Its twisted surprise. I wasn't prepared for the following events.

A blood-soaked warp whistle ominously rose from what I now believe to be the deepest crevice of hell. It blipped twice as the normal whistle would. That, my fellow reader, was the only normality of what I have played today. It played a deep tune that I can't get out of my head as I write this. The whistle descended, violently striking Mario in the chest. He unleashed a bloodcurdling scream as it went into his back and out of his chest. This cry wasn't 8-bit at all. It wasn't even cartoon-esque. It was the sound of unfiltered anguish, of utter agony. His expression reflected the same. To end my experience on this perverse version of something I once loved, Mario was transported to the warp zone of the Blood Whistle.

 

I call it this because it had only the cookie-cutter outline of the quaint island. The water consisted solely of the same blood aforementioned in my encounter with the whistle. Corpses of Koopas and other enemies of Mario were scattered afloat near the shores. White menacing eyes glared at me between the waves, surfacing just to cast their evil glance at Mario (or me, I can't be sure at this point). All of the worlds were indicated by their respective numbers, and all of the dots were crimson. At that point I noticed yet another abnormality, this time concerning the dot for world eight. Beside it were two 8-bit patches of fire that twisted and contorted in place. Without me pressing any buttons, the whistle stabbed Mario in the ribs. This cued him to move to the world two dot. Refusing to pay any further attention to the horrors that surely await in the distorted desert, I saved the game and quit. I have played more than enough of my fill for today.

I guess that I figured out the acronym from the ROM title meant Blood Whistle the hard way. Despite the horrors that plague this abomination, I will continue to subject myself to this suffering for the sake of all of you. Well, also for mine. It'll help me keep track of the days, and maybe this desperate attempt to cling to my stable frame of mind won't prove to be in total vain.

There are five thousand people that have followed this blog in the two days that it's been up. After this pointedly interesting post, I'm hoping to have some more. For those of you following my posts, read tomorrow's and share with your friends. I need you to expose the stark luridness of this shell of something I once knew and loved.

 

I absolutely love that he instantly goes from "poor unsuspecting victim" to "my mind has been shattered by the cosmic horrors beyond our comprehension" in the span of a single day. Nothing has happened that would warrent that kind of reaction yet. In like, a real story, that would be where your protagonist ends up at the conslusion. Also, does the blood in that image look "too real for 8-bit graphics" to anyone?

 

JUNE 8TH, 2012
Well, I did it. I managed to clench the fickle fibers of my perception of reality long enough to play through world two. I have come to the conclusion that whoever made this is completely and utterly deranged. There's been a rusted gear or a broken spring in the mechanics of their sadistic mind. Their only purpose in creating this mod was to mentally and psychologically flagellate the naïve soul poor enough to take the bait of its mysterious origin. Well, I'm certainly naïve enough to fall into that category. I digress, to the experience.

I find myself asking how I could have missed major things like this yesterday when I saved the game in this world. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Blood of the same texture from before was just as splattered across the desert sands as sand itself was. Solitary eyes watched me from the pyramids. Pentagrams and other satanic symbols were also infrequent in the environment. Could this hack be the work of the Illuminati? OK, enough pondering. I need to finish this grim tale. Skeletons of Koopas littered the bleak landscape. There was a distinct disturbance with Mario's appearance, though. He looked starved and parched, as one would typically look after a few days in the desert. Mario then moved into the 2-1 block without my command and the music began to play shortly after.

 

This was a reversed version of the overworld theme. Whispers and other paranormal phenomena could be heard playing in harmony with the music, saying cryptic things. After about a minute I began to record the sound. I'll upload it as soon as possible, but I know I definitely can't do it today. One of the most distinct things I kept hearing was "let the whistle guide you" and "the instrument of blood plays the sweetest tune". This creeped me out needless to say, but this of all things wouldn't prevent me from playing out the remainder of this game.

The stage itself was VERY scary. The sky was grayish-blue accompanied by an almost white sun. The colors weren't bright or cheery in the slightest. The pyramid blocks were faded and cracked, and the wooden blocks were obviously rotting. Mario's sprite was visibly starving and pleading for thirst. The fire creatures fixedly stared at me like a shark stares at a school of fish, seeming to know who their next meal was. The neutral expressions of the Koopas had changed into ones of converged disgust and loath. I had obtained the raccoon by now, so I ran along the pipe-looking platform and took off.

 

I flew for a little while, which was nice. Mario's face changed as well, being the normal happy smile you usually see throughout the entire game. I relished in the few moments of happiness I sought from this game. These moments were mercilessly ended within the course of a few seconds. The sky flashed a gloomy black before the Blood Whistle came and impaled the poor plumber yet again. Mario fell, his corpulent figure going limp until he hit the ground with a thump that I swore I could feel.

He was miraculously alive, his body twitching in a feeble attempt to rise. A fire creature jumped on Mario, who was now pinned to the ground and screaming in pain. His scream was bitterly realistic. It reeked of such ineffable pain it hurts me now to describe the sheer degree of torture this character was put through. There he was. Burning and seething in pain and there I sat, completely powerless. Forced to watch what I thought was the end of his trials on world two. I was so wrong.

The level select came into view. Whistle through back, Mario was transported to one of the Pyramid levels. When the level started, the background was an egregious smoke-filled black. Bursts of lightning filled the sky with illumination. Winged demons in flight were visible upon these strikes. Also in the skies glowed stagnantly lit pentagrams and 666. Mario was being carried by two of Bowser's sons up one of the game's pyramid structures. However, this particular structure was vastly different than the regular ones.

 

The bricks were cracked and faded with age. The edges were jagged with dried blood caked each block. Nothing but a heavy drum beat and the sounds of thunder played in the background. The thunder didn't play in unison with lightning as happens in most games. There was an eerily realistic pause between the flare of the lightning and the boom of the thunder. As the top of the structure was reached, I saw the worst thing yet.

Bowser towered above everyone else, intimidating and terrible. Below stood four of his sons, two of which had carried Mario: Morton, Iggy, Ray, and Von Koopa. Above the entire scene were the words Blood Whistle in bright red neon letters. Bowser's face had to have been ten times more evil then I had ever seen it. His green shell was cracked, and his white spines had been dipped in blood. Blood was fresh on his teeth also as his serpentine tongue licked them, making clear his intentions on what to do with Mario after he had disposed of him. It was then I came to a dooming realization.

Mario can't die. The game won't let him. However many things are thrown at him, in however many ways he is brutally maimed, mortality will not escape him. For a time, that is. He will continue to be sustained by whatever dark force or sick mind that drives the rest of these occurrences to passing until the game's eventual end, in which he will ruefully and painfully perish. Now that that has been said, to continue today's experience.

Suddenly, Von Koopa produced a dagger. It gleamed with uncanny realism in the light of the Blood Whistle sign that loomed above. After a brief pause, he began to slice Mario's chest open. Mario again brayed that fearful cry, a cry that implied he would die only to endure torture of ten times the magnitude. Tears streamed down his faced as Von removed his heart, still pumping. He handed it to Bowser, who ate it with a crunching chomp.

 

His sons laughed as he did this, blood flowing from Mario's exposed abdomen. With a bark from their twisted father, the sons shamelessly began to regurgitate and tear apart what was open. As they were doing this, Mario slowly turned his head towards me and uttered a single question through tears and blood: "w-w-why?"

I myself asked the very same question. Why would they treat him as an animal- if not less- for their amusement? Why would someone initiate the genesis of such a horrid contraption? A contraption in which life and death have no meaning and are manipulates, a contraption in which concepts such as morals, remorse and mercy are completely foreign? It makes me shudder to think that there is someone sick enough out there to put a character through this kind of unbearable hell just to sit back and laugh. It makes me absolutely sick to my core.

Oh, that reminds me of another thing. You're probably wondering as to why I complacently talk about Mario as if he's a human being. A human who suffers pain, sorrow, depression, starvation, and thirst like the rest of us. A human who is also capable of feeling happiness, remorse, goodwill and love like anyone else. It's because I am thoroughly convinced that he is. Please, don't stop following this blog because you think I'm insane. That will come later.

 

I believe without a shadow of a doubt that inside this game is a character with a complex range of emotions, someone who feels like you and me. But it's just a game right? It's just a contrived mixture of code and data put together to present words and images, correct? Wrong. I know with everything inside of me that Mario has to be alive. I have seen him truly happy and truly sad, and at one point I may even see him truly angry. He feels like any other living, breathing human being.

I don't know how. I don't know why. I don't know how something so human could rise from something so truly inhuman. A character with a soul seemed completely impossible to me before I played this hack. I now have a goal with this game: to keep this poor creature safe. I suppose I now know the real truth. I'll see you all tomorrow. Same place, same time.

 

so this guy is like Chris and thinks that at least Mario is real
I get it, a lot of people think fictional characters are like real people and get emotionally attached to them, it happens, but seeing Mario as some sort of . . . pet?

 

This guy makes Moviebob saying the Console Wars being like his own Vietnam and having a meltdown realizing Mario was never from Brooklyn look like a sane individual

 

so I guess video game characters are pets now
there are games that have actual pets in them, instead of playing a game that will make a college kid kill himself

 

If vidya characters could be pets, I could adopt one of the fuzzier cuter pocketmons as one. Like an Eevee.

But then again, there's already cats IRL.

 

I don't know, owning a video game character as a pet seems like it would be a lot of work especially considering a lot of them have special powers that can be potentially dangerous

 

JUNE 9TH, 2012
It's me again. I had a horrible range of nightmares last night that are a direct result of playing this game. Some really weird stuff also went down. Before I get into today's gameplay, I'll have to go through them with you guys so I'll have an interactive record of my dreaming habits related to this game. I myself am having a hard time as to how they were so close to home, and what they mean for my seemingly inevitable downfall.

Before I tell this, I have to let you in on a piece of relevant information. In the 4th grade, I used to play the recorder. Every kid had to learn some musical skill, and I liked wind instruments because of their method of play, appearance, and sound. Such is the irony of the instrument that has caused me all of this grief. In my dream I was playing the instrument in a dark room.

I was my 4th grade self, just coolly playing Mary Had a Little Lamb. Out of nowhere, I began to cough. I had choked on some blood that had materialized within and around my recorder. It covered it, and soon filled it. Blood began to pour in great quantity out of all of the recorder's holes. It soon began to float in mid-air and hover. A few seconds passed, and then it struck me in the chest. It had impaled me, going directly through my heart and every other vital artery one could think of.

I woke up, the sheets plastered to my bare chest with sweat. I was completely fine. Not a scratch on me. As I sat there in bed, afraid of how I'm sure the game did this – or maybe it was just me losing my sanity – I began to hear noise coming from my laptop. It was closed, but a faint muffled humming sound was clearly audible. I warily approached my computer, the machine almost looking alive. I then opened it up.

It was a picture of a SMB3 Raccoon Mario sprite on a black backdrop. He was chained up by his legs and feet, and the chains reached outside of the screen. The Blood Whistle sat as the centerpiece of it all through Mario's chest.