Meta Is Chris actually capable of holding down a job?

The only way I could see him finding work is if he worked with an organization like Goodwill or a local charity that specializes in job training and placement for a year or two or even longer successfully, which would probably involve him having to do something like work in a Goodwill store as a volunteer, which would give him some kind of work record and a good reference. Places like that would also work with Chris to improve his workplace communication skills. It would be a long slog.

But as others have pointed out, considering the character of Chris, there's no way he'd do such a thing. Doing something like that would require a great deal of humility, sobriety (as in acknowledgment of harsh reality) and maturity that Chris doesn't have, and it would fly completely in the face of his preferred coping mechanisms.

 

Yeah... He's not gonna be able to hold down a job because he is an unmotivated slug like everyone else has said plus there's the issue of his nonexistent hygiene, strange behavior worsened by prolonged isolation and perhaps the most important would be the lack of motivation and possibly as @TiggleYaPoosay mentioned, he might not get tasks done correctly because his mind is all over the place.

This is ignoring the mass of weens that follows him as well because as we know, they will do anything to fuck him up

 

You know if he actually got a job he’d immediately post all the details online and weens would start their shit and then Chris would start his “trolls won’t even let me have a job!”.

 

That's the biggest obstacle at this point. Suppose chris bit the bullet and admitted he needed to start doing better and got a job? The weens would try to make him unemployed again.

 

My thoughts on chris the master criminal.

 

"trolling valahalla" Is an excellent way to put it. All these kids want to be famous for annoying an autistic manchild, I have no idea why they would want anything to do with Chris in the first place seeing as any contact with him immediately involves either harrasment from Chris or from the asscrack of the internet (kiwi farms)

 

"Surely this time it will be different!"

 

I dont know if you saw this but today two kiwi farms members, one being a well known speedrunner (whos going to sgdq) Visited Chris's house. Chris even posted there pictures and tagged them on twitter. I dont know why the hell you would do this especially if you already have a decent following. I bet 5 dollars that a bunch of weens will come to sgdq to chastise this kid, it will be cannibal weening

 

Chris hasn’t had a job in 20 years, and wasn’t raised to have responsibilities. Until a few years ago when the Finachu Crisis started, Chris had spent his entire adult life basically doing what he wants and no amount of “You need to work hard.” is going to undo that.
However, I think Chris could hold down a job but he’d have to really want to, like how smokers have to WANT to quit.
The problem is, the amount of training and counseling it would take to get Chris to that point would take a lot of time and energy, and that’s not even addressing the inevitable sexual harassment when Chris works with a female that shows him basic human kindness because that’s her job. It might be easier for all parties just to keep the tugboat running.

 

Chris can't function in society, he's mentally ill and he has terrible art skills. He can get a job creating a show for Cartoon Network.

 

There are organizations that specialize in helping special needs people find simple jobs like bagging groceries or sorting recycling or whatever.

 

And stop the humor train from crashing and burning, you would deny us that? You Monster.

 

Oh, I'd love that!

 

It would only be a matter of time until someone TERK ES JERB

 

Easily
Chris could work as a gravedigger

 

Well chris had dug himself into financial turmoil so maybe.

 

There was that time he dug up Patti's grave. Sort of. Would you fuck me, 789chan? I'd fuck me

P.S. - I’m an obnoxious, unfunny sped and I delete my threads and posts when they don’t get the attention and adoration I think they deserve.