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Meta Would Chris survive prison?

Discussion in 'CWC Discussion' started by One Too Many, Aug 11, 2021.

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Would Chris survive prison?

  1. Yes

    5 vote(s)
    29.4%
  2. No

    12 vote(s)
    70.6%
  1. NAITCHA BAH

    NAITCHA BAH 16-time World Champion

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    Now, on the flip side, he may not have this free time to think because of the constant abuse he very well may suffer from both the prison staff and other inmates. That may lead to even more classic Chris narcissism and even lead him to believe he's a martyr to the Merge.
     
  2. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    Consensus seems to be that Chris is going to be in a lower tier prison, basically, filled with guys just going "I wanna do my time and get the fuck outta here", so, most likely, while they'd probably rag on Chris, they wouldn't beat him up or shank him.
     
  3. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat "Modernly Tech Savvy"

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    speaking of the food tag added by @One Too Many

    Chris' diet could improve too. Without almost daily fast food, his obesity could go down. The symptoms of heart problems, diabetes, or other fat issues - that Chris thinks are "psychic powers" - could go away, or at least get reduced. Also it's possible there'd be no more DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS.
     
  4. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    Not just his obesity and symptoms, but there is the ever so slight possibility that his delusions that The Idea Guys and Bella planted in his head could be, while possibly not gone completely, at least reduced in scale, by a prison psychiatrist. With no weens or trolls to "go along with" his delusions, or add to them, Chris *might* be able to realize "Hmm, yeah, there *Was* no Merge after all...."
     
  5. NAITCHA BAH

    NAITCHA BAH 16-time World Champion

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    To go along with both our points about time and health, he may actually start legit exercising too. Not because he wants to at first, but just because it will be something new and he'll be in desperate need of something new after a while. That will help with both his physical and mental health.
     
  6. Henry Bemis

    Henry Bemis On an eight-hour tour of a graveyard

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    It was either suggested here or elsewhere, but isn't prison food high in calories? Would that mitigate any potential weight loss?
     
  7. ICanFeelTheCosmos0704

    ICanFeelTheCosmos0704 the augh yeah man

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    You can get food in the cafeteria or the commissary. I assume cafeteria food is the same wherever. Yeah, inmates love food with a lot of sugar and caffeine they can get from the commissary, just like people outside of prisons do too. A lot of the guys do bodybuilding and need to eat a lot of tuna packs, which are like dollar bills in prison.
     
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  8. NAITCHA BAH

    NAITCHA BAH 16-time World Champion

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    Calories themselves aren't necessarily the issue. If Chris is doing a workout plan to build muscle (fewer reps, higher weight, and isolating body parts), then a lot of those calories will be used to build muscle. He'll put some fat on too, but not so much that it would cause alarm. The question (inb4 "dumb" react): does Chris produce enough testosterone to build muscle?
     
  9. lumen

    lumen Member

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    I don't think so. The prisoners will kick Chris' ass over his childlike nature and his many flaws. Even in a minimum security prison. By the time Chris gets out of prison, Barb would be dead.
     
  10. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    As interesting as that scenario would be, again, remember, this is a minimum security prison. Most of the prisoners there most likely have the mindset of "I wanna just do my sentence and get the fuck out of here...."

    Would they probably rag on Chris? Behind his back and to his face? Sure, yeah. Shank him? Beat him up? Most likely not.
     
  11. NAITCHA BAH

    NAITCHA BAH 16-time World Champion

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    You would think, but those who have been watching Chris for a little bit have seen his plot armor get him through some situations that shouldn't have gone nearly as well for him as they did.
     
  12. lumen

    lumen Member

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    Even with his autism Id be surprised if he gets into a minimum security prison
     
  13. lumen

    lumen Member

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    I honestly think he may survive but barely
     
  14. Vexing Devil

    Vexing Devil pokes you for 4 whether you like it or not.

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    it'd probably be the reason they get sent to minimum or a state run mental facility
     
  15. One Too Many

    One Too Many Sexual Orientation: Heavy Metal

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  16. ICanFeelTheCosmos0704

    ICanFeelTheCosmos0704 the augh yeah man

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    I like the Commodore logo on his left arm
     
  17. ToroidalBoat

    ToroidalBoat "Modernly Tech Savvy"

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    I like how he couldn't triforce.
     
  18. c-no

    c-no autistic screeching war mascot with horse cringe

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    The heart mom tattoo takes a whole new meaning.