What are your most Hated Movies?

^ That ending would have been so much more powerful than what we got.

 

2012 for its disgusting treatment of characters and massively shit, moralist, ending that has me agreeing entirely with the villains rather than the "heroes".

 

My most hated movie ended up being something that isn't even released yet.
When I think of any movie I despise, I now think it could always be worse.

Spoiler: much, much worse

 

.... Oh boy.

In no particular order:

Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within - Video game movies are easy targets for these kinds of lists, but FF:TSW is one of the worst. I'll concede the CGI was great for its time, but the voice cast was wasted and the story was infuriating and awful at the same time.

Deadpool - For me, the meta humor wore off very quick, and I didn't find anything remotely amusing about it. At all. I can at least appreciate it for what it was trying to do, but it's still a shit movie that's overhyped and overrated simply because it's a capeflick where they swear, have sex, and there's violence. Whoop-dee-doo.

Pacific Rim - I really can't stand this movie. This was shoved non-stop in my face by my friends before I even saw it, and everyone was treating this like it was the second coming, and I just got tired of seeing it before I even saw the movie. So my perceptions might be a little clouded. But I couldn't bring myself to care about the characters or the worldbuilding. Ron Perlman was the only remotely good thing about this, but that's not really saying much, either.

Frozen - It reminded me that I grew out of Disney princess musicals when I hit puberty. Enough said.

Most of the Studio Ghibli movies - I know this is heresy, but let's be real honest here: once you've seen one Miyazaki/Ghibli movie? Chances are you've seen them all, since they're just as formulaic and predictable as Disney movies are at times. The only one I like to some extent is Princess Mononoke, but that's about it. But to be fair... they're pretty to look at, at least?

 

My favorite of them is the EarthSea one, which was allegedly so bad that it brought a retired Hayao back out of retirement for like the seventh time (truth is, he's just one of those guys that doesn't like being retired and it's clearly so at this point). The film wasn't any worse than a typical Ghibli film in any way and the final act plot twist actually made sense to someone like me who saw the signs coming.

Spoiler: The Twist

The burn victim girl is a dragon. This is telegraphed about as blatantly as possible without someone saying "She's like a dragon or something" or some stupid line like that.

* Introverted, traditional Western Dragon behavior.

* Affinity for sheep.

* Her parents burned her face and then abandoned her. If they were humans, wouldn't they have like beaten her or something instead? But no, it was specifically burning.

My biggest problem with the movie was that the supposedly horrifyingly disfiguring burns on the love interest girl amounted to nothing more than mild redness on one cheek. My second-biggest problem with it was that she and the lead character guy didn't stay together after the big reveal.


So yeah, my favorite Ghibli film is Ghibli purists' usual least-favorite.

We tried seeing if having the people who make the games make the movie could give us a good videogame movie. Instead they made a terrible movie with no relation to the games and slapped the game's name on it.

Not that the writing of Final Fantasy games was any good around that point in the series.

 

All I remember is that it had some superficial elements (a Cid, crystals/spirits/mystical hoohah, and... that's it) and some digital actress figure that was billed as "The Next Big Thing" and even got a thing in Maxim at the time, but she was quickly forgotten when it became clear the movie was a turd on arrival. I just remember sitting in my seat, absolutely miserable and wishing I could skip out to the Johnny Rockets next door to the cinema instead, except I'd spent all the money that was given to me on the ticket + snacks, so I pretty much had to suck it up. I think after that experience, it made me more inclined to check out various reviews before blindly going into an adaptation movie based on brand name alone.

Of course, Square eventually realized after the failure that TSW was that people didn't want some generic depressing sci-fi movie with superficial elements tacked on and donut steel OCs, they wanted a movie with the characters from the games they know and love. Which gave us... Advent Children.

Welcome to the new boss, same as the old boss.

 

You think they might eventually realize we like things other than FF7 and [newest main entry in franchise]?

*rainbow*

 

- Team America: World Police. Why do people think this is a good movie? Couldn't make it through more than 20 minutes, found the whole thing insultingly stupid. South Park is more classy than this fucking movie.

- American Psycho. I watched this movie with a guy I had recently made friends with, only to discover (after watching the movie) that he idolized Patrick Bateman. He took great pride in his mental illness and tried to dress, act, and conduct himself like Bateman - even though he still lived with his parents at age 23. Turned me off to the movie entirely, to this day I can't watch clips of it or see stills of it without feeling my whole body clench up. There really are people like that guy who think that kind of behavior is okay - why make serial killers and psychopaths sympathetic? (I have the same problem with Dexter now too).

- Deadpool. Pandering, stupid, overhyped. The girlfriend character was pretty much pulled from the mind of a horny, basement-dwelling virgin.

- 90% of sequel or remake movies, especially the ones made for kids. Get fucking original, please. Make a movie to tell a story, not to rake in money.
- Pete's Dragon gets a special mention. As cheesy as it was, I loved the original as a child, and seeing it raped with CG and dark lighting just makes me rage.

- Pretty much any Adam Sandler movie except 50 First Dates, The Wedding Singer, Grown Ups (for some reason), and Big Daddy.

- Talladega Nights. I'm picky about my Will Ferrell and this was not good. White trash just doesn't seem funny to me.

- Sausage Party. Never even saw it, never figured out why it was allowed to exist. Seemed even more insultingly stupid than Team America World Police.

- Apocalypto. I'd never felt the need to vomit before I saw this movie. You end up rooting for the Spanish to come in and kill everyone. Senseless violence for the sake of violence, incredibly non-compelling characters.

 

I hated the rushed and disjointed pacing in it and that I had actually read the EarthSea book it was imitating long prior. I think that's partially why many people disliked it, not that the ending was some sort of amazing twist they couldn't understand, but because the general flow and storyline was uncomfortable compared to other Ghibli films. I have to agree it isn't their best adaptation, but I wouldn't call it horrendous or even their worst film. I mean, that movie with the folklore tanuki attacking people with their ball sacs is pretty weird.

Adding to some lists:
Deadpool - My s/o and I only laughted at one part and it involved the big russian guy I forget the name of. The rest just had us eyerolling.
Angry Birds - I've never been so bored watching a cartoon in my life
Suicide Squad - Honestly I haven't seen this one, but I couldn't get over the portrayal of Harley Quinn in the previews to even bring myself to watch it. It gave me flashbacks to the "LOL SO RANDOM XD" days of the internet I never wanted to relive.

Majority of things with Tom Cruise or Leonardo DiCaprio in it
Now I have a reason for this, so bare with me. Some films I can stomach, but even then one thing bothers the shit out of me: I am always blatantly aware during the film that I'm watching Tom Cruise or Leonardo Dicaprio act. You know when you're watching an action flick and you just kind of zone out into a state of complacency and just enjoy the explosions or whatever? I can't. All I see is Tom Cruise doing Tom Cruise as someone else. I don't know why I have this problem with either of them. Some of the films they're in are actually really good and I've watched them a few times, but its always there.. bothering me. I still haven't seen the film Oblivion, which I had been initially excited to see, because part way through the trailer there he was.. Tom Cruise.

EDIT: Also unpopular opinion of a movie I liked a lot, but a lot of people seemed to hate: Prometheus.

 

I hated Napoleon Dynamite. So many people talk about what a great movie it is, but I was bored out of my skull. I'm normally into dry humor but that movie is just.... I don't really get the appeal.

 

Spoiler: Truth about Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

I thankfully ignored that movie. Advent Children is dumb too though. At least it looks nice.

 

And that one's my second-favorite. It doesn't really have a great story or anything, it's more like a bunch of small vignettes based on minor folktales and time advances for the characters. Worst part of that one is the main character breaking the fourth wall and addressing the camera at the end to deliver the obligatory Studio Ghibli message about nature being important and stuff.

The EarthSea one I don't care how accurate it is to the books as I didn't read the books. I liked the much-maligned live action TV movies too.

 

I never liked the Paranormal Activity franchise. I know that isn't unpopular in the slightest, but my point still stands. There's nothing scary about it.

Oh, and there's also Batman V. Superman. Too much shit in one movie.

 

I hated Suicide Squad with a passion. As said before. Edgy, Clunky, no real story-line and laughably awful character writing.

Also, The Warcraft movie. Like the effects and costume design were some of the shittiest I've seen in a while. But...Y'know. Video game movies are always shit with exception of -maybe- the first Silent Hill movie...Wasn't great, but it wasn't horrible. The little girl actress was the worst part of it. The first three Resident Evil movies were so bad they were good, and that kind of holds true to the Super Mario brothers movie.

 

As far as recent movies go, probably The Lobster. I somehow forced myself to sit through the whole thing.

 

The only Tom Cruise movie I can bring myself to watch is 'Days of Thunder', and that's only and solely for Michael Rooker as Rowdy Burns.

IMHO the Super Mario Bros. movie does indeed suck, but in a weird way, it's been vindicated by shittier video game movie adaptations being released since then. Not to mention it's a good movie to down some booze and riff on with friends (or watch the official RiffTrax with Mike Nelson and Company). Warcraft, I think, was trying to aim really high and it ended up being like David Lynch's 'Dune', in that it expects you to know everything about the lore going in (my folks saw Dune when it first came out, and the theater they saw it at was handing out cheat sheets about who was who, and what was what). Or people were expecting something based on World of Warcraft and not the original, pre-MMORPG games. Who knows.

Besides, 'Moon' is the better of Duncan Jones' movies, IMHO.

 

- oh man i watched pacific rim, but my brain blanked out that memory. probably to protect me. can't remember from what.

- yiffsburg. it looked cool and i liked all the sections of the city with the environments. side note, i was bugged by some scale issues. the otters are smaller than rabbits??? that sheep girl is the size of the bunny with humanoid eyes where the other sheep are appropriately sized with normal sheep eyes? and why is it only mammals. are non mammals not animals? and where are the primates? there's many different mammals but they only stuck to tigers, foxes, bunnies, sheep, bears, pigs, elephants, hippos, sloths, antelopes, but there are also binturongs, monotremes, pangolins, moles, bats, PRIMATES, come one. they really didn't make the populace as interesting as the city layout.

- mononoke hime. THERE IS EVIL IN THE WORK OF THE LAND TO THE WEST. hm, that sounds familiar. hey, in that nausicaa movie, wasn't there EVIL IN THE WEST? and in that goldfish girl movie, URGH. HUMANS. said the water-breathing human guy. hey i wonder if the director might be a commie. hey it's cool, japan never pulled any imperialist shit!!! anyway.

- team america. oh yeah, i forgot about this one. the puppetry was the only funny thing. that and the usage of housecats and dogfish to represent their larger counterparts and to get some puppet gore in. the rest was unfunny bullshit. the way the puppets walked was hilarious though. should have been nothing but puppets with guns walking funny and getting gored by kittens and fishies.

 

Voyage of the Dawn Treader made me hate myself. It was doomed from the start since I saw it in 3D, and 3D doesn't work well with my fucked up lazy eye. VOTDT was a huge part of my childhood, like all the Narnia books. I had the audiobook narrated by Derek Jacobi which I could pretty much recite.The movie was just so bland and soulless, no one looked like they wanted to be there, and it didn't have that same wistful quality that always got me about the Narnia series. I loved reading them (or being read them by my mum while I was in the hospital) but they always left me feeling sad, like I myself had stepped out of a fantasy world back into reality.
Sperging aside, it was a shitty film and I'm just glad the studio gave up before trying to adapt the other books.

 

Part of the problem is that they were too proud of their dragon animation. Eustace turning into a dragon was supposed to be an important metaphor and a big part of his character development being getting rid of the blasted curse.

Another big problem was them changing the island where dreams come true from being an aside that the group wisely avoided as soon as they realized what that really means to a location for the movie to have a generic action-based climax that it didn't need was another problem.

The seeds of bad adaptation were sown all over Prince Caspian, this one just put the nails in the coffin.

Reepicheep is still my favorite character.

 

I think the problem was the Narnia books, while they work as a book series, they don't really work well on film. The seven books have 6 different sets of protagonists - The Pensieve siblings in LW&W and Caspian, Eustace and Jill from The Silver Chair, Edmund, Lucy & Eustace in Dawn Treader, whatever were their names from The Magician's Nephew, the eponymous Horse and his Boy, and then all of the above and then some in the last book. This works for a book series better than a movie franchise. How many movie franchises hand over the protagonist reins that often? Plus movie series have to deal with people watching the movies without having read the source material. Who outside of fans of the books would watch a Horse and his Boy movie? (Horse and his Boy is kind of the Rogue One of Narnia - it's a good book on its own merits, and it's a great world builder, but it's pretty irrelevant to the main plot and you can skip it and not miss much.) The books are too disjointed to make a good series of film. That said, the LW&W film was as good, good as I'd say it could have been. They just should have stopped there. Especially since they were going by the books' publication order, not the story chronological order.

But Reepicheep is awesome, he is, was, and always will be.

Note: We're getting a Silver Chair film at some point, but it's a reboot of the franchise from another company. Here's to it staying in development hell.