Legal Jail of Fail

All the mess he's in - like with "tugboat" - could've been avoided if Chris just didn't "Soul Bond" with Barb.

Spoiler

(reply 1000 lol)

 

He is going to have a hell of a time getting his tugboat back after committing a felony. I had a roommate who was former military, and once he got popped with felony-level drug charges he lost all of his. If they will do that to former military in a country that licks boots as hard as America does, they will definitely take Chris's away and not give it back.

 

Yeah, from what I heard, if you are found not guilty by reason of insanity (which also gets your tugboat taken away), you generally have a better case as far as getting it back, but I doubt Chris could muster that verdict considering he tried to hide his involvement with Barb.

He'd better lawyer up if he wants even the smallest chance of getting it. Disability lawyers generally work on a contingency where if they win the case, they get a cut of your backpay which is why lawyers will only work with people who they deem have a solid case. I know a disability lawyer who had to turn people down. He basically said, if you can't hold a full time 40 hour a week job as something simple as a Walmart greeter or someone checking memberships at Costco (note full time, if you can do a part time minimum wage tard job, you can still qualify and many judges like seeing a work history of you attempting to work which Chris obviously doesn't have), then he won't take you.

As for the court hearings for tugboats, usually there is the judge, you, your lawyer, and a vocational counselor representing the SSA. The judge and counselor will ask you questions and you will have to respond appropriately. Usually your lawyer will rehearse it with you beforehand which, of course, I doubt Chris will listen to his lawyer and also fuck up his chances to prove his case to the judge

Of course, I don't think Chris would even think he could appeal the SSA's rejection

 

To misquote Back to the Future:

Tugboats? Where Chris is going, he won’t need tugboats.

 

A misquote, but true.

 

You know, one of the ways he could have also lost his tugboat that I am surprised Chris never realized was that he could lose it if he got married. Of course, not all people will lose their tugboat if they are married. If you get SSDI via your work history, then you will be fine, but Chris gets SSDI through Bob which is different because if you get SSDI on your own accord, your benefits won't be affected if you get married (you also can have more assets compared to SSI which can also be reduced or taken away if you get married depending on spouse income).

In some ways, Chris going on a Lovequest was not in his best interest, but he never realized that, well, maybe he did since he wouldn't be allowed to marry his mother anyways.

 

It's funny how an autistic analogy became a somewhat popular way of referring to welfare payment.

 

On the one hand, he would lose his tugboat. On the other hand, his dream girl makes good money and would support his......sedentary lifestyle, thus erasing his need for a tugboat. You can find an attractive, rich woman who will financially support you, but you better look as good as Channing Tatum and fuck like Ron Jeremy. Chris is not the former, and something tells me he does not do the latter lol.

 

For some reason, I doubt a lot of tugboat recipients are super attractive. If you have a mental illness or developmental disability, inability to keep up with your basic appearance works in your favor of getting a tugboat. They also look at your ability to do chores around the house and doing domestic tasks which are kind of important for a "house husband"

 

In a recent letter to Helena, Chris crapped out this heretical derping:

 

I don't bother reading these in detail.
Chris's delusions used to be interesting because he had multiple works of fiction to derive them from. Now it's all Jesus, all the time.

 

I miss "Christory" when Chris claimed to be Christian, instead of LARPing as a cartoon pony mascot "goddess".

I also miss "Christory" when "Idea Guys" didn't spark the idiotic "Dimensional Merge" in CWC's rotting brain.

 

Chris may have claimed to be Christian but I don't think he ever actually read the Bible until now. His main source for Christian theology was, of all goddamn things, Family Guy.

 

And Borb.

 

In Chris's defense, there is so much contradiction, inconsistency, and overall stupid shit in the Bible that you can really believe whatever you want and still be a Christian.

You would be surprised. I have a good number of veteran friends who play up their injuries to get more out of disability, and they are still in really good shape. Plus, we live in a far-right dystopia (and I live in the reddest of those red states) full of Fox Newsies who will suck off anyone in a uniform.

But this, however, is definitely not Chris lol.

 

About a month left to the next court date.

I don't think the case can be continued longer, so Chris will either go to prison, mental hospital, or free.

But if it's yet another continuance, I don't think I'd be surprised.

 

About 3 weeks left.

Whatever happens, letting Chris go back to 14BLC with Barb there would kind of be an incompetent move.

 

Is Chris going to trend again on Twitter?

 

Who knows? If he pulls another huge stunt, definitely.