Chris-Chan is officially dead.

Guys, I have some shocking news that you may find difficult to believe.

Last night I was happily texting Chris-Chan (he thinks I'm a girl, he's calling me his sweetheart), while fantasizing about the future we would have together once he learns my true gender and accepts me for who I am because he's such a tolerant and caring individual. He's truly changed for the better!

Anyways, back on track, at a certain point the texts stopped, and I got worried. What if something had happened to my sweet little Christine? I didn't think that I could find the strength to continue living if something terrible had happened to him.

Thankfully, as I was preparing to take a cyanide pill, Christine saved my life when he requested to FaceTime. I hesitantly agreed, because I figured that perhaps now would be a good time to reveal my true self to him.

So, he opened up FaceTime and the second he saw my face he...well...how do I put this gently...

He tied a noose around his neck and hung himself while I watched in terror. I didn't know how to react, I immediately logged out of FaceTime as soon as I saw his body go limp in the noose and hugged my beloved Sonichu plush until I felt like the scary suicide that I had just witnessed felt a little less scary.

I'll never forget the last words that Chris-Chan said to me before he hung himself from the noose.

"April fools."

 

Shocker

 

Remember when Chris hung himself with a wireless PlayStation controller?

 

That was just for pleasure.

 

Sounds like you kind of left her hanging this morning, you know?

 

He will be missed.

 

Dicks out for Chris Chan.

 

F

 

I didn’t read this whole thing but I’d just like to say rest in piece.