Meta Who would you cast in a Chris Chan movie?

Charlie Day as Chris (will require extensive body makeup)
Sally Field as Barb
Robert Duvall as Bob
Chris Pratt as Sonichu
Kirsten Schall as Rosechu
Laura Dern as Mary Lee Walsh
Stanley Tucci as Cole
Milla Jovovich as Megan
Bryan Cranston as Michael Snyder
Christopher Mintz-Plasse as Clyde Cash
Jonah Hill as Bluespike
Ryan Reynolds as Liquid
Emma Stone as Jackie

 

Fuck, I love when this thread happens.

First of all, a CWC movie has to be surreal as duck but have a shock humor tint to it. Therefore, Louis C.K. should write the screenplay and David Lynch should direct it. As for the cast, we need two Chris: real Chris and CWCville Chris, since some of the movie should be from Chris's point of view. Here's my cast list.

Real Chris: Jonah Hill, because who else could pull it off.

CWCville Chris: Michael Cera. It seems that Chris sees his comic persona as this lovable, reluctant, shy hero.

Barb: Kathy Bates
Bob: Clint Eastwood
Cole: Corey Stoll.
Sonichu: Quinton Flynn.
Rosechu: Tara Strong, although it would take a miracle to get her involved.

Now, the gal-pals and sweethearts:
Megan: Kristen Stewart
Blanca: Gal Gadot
Julie: Ariana Grande
Bluespike/Julie voice-over: Finn Wolfhard. I want all of Julie's dialogue done by him but synced over Ariana Grande to capture how obvious the ruse is to everyone but Chris.
Ivy: Emma Stone
Kacey: Rebel Wilson
Jackie: Dakota Johnson

And for our antagonists....
Jason Kendrick Howell: Chris Pratt
Pickle Man: Idris Elba or Jason Mamoa because the Emily date, of from Chris point of view, would involve someone with massive sex appeal enthralling Emily away from him like a vampire.
Clyde Cash: Dave Franco
Liquid Chris: Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Even impersonating the guy impersonating Chris, he'd still be charming as shit, which is what you want in a Liquid Chris.
Alec Benson Leary: David Tennant. Seriously, that is David Tennant in the ABL pics, right?

Did I leave anyone out?

 

I approve, but for Clint Eastwood. That is a bit to hardcore for Bob. I nominate Johnny Knoxville with all the make up from Bad Grandpa.

 

But once again, some of this has to be from Chris's point of view, and Chris did see Bob as that hard (mainly because Bob made Chris not be a vegetable from time to time).

Oh, I forgot about Mary Lee Walsh. How about Jessica Walter as the real MLW and Rachel Bloom as the CWCville MLW? And let's go with Seth Rogan as Adam Stackhouse.

 

Kiefer sutherland as Chris
Laura dern as Meghan
Jared Leto as bluespike
Sam waterson as Bob
Kathy Bates at Barb
Lloyd christopher as sonichu
Frank oz as mlw(mlw is a sophisticated life sized puppet in this movie)
Wayne knight As snyder

My cwc movie would be a psychological thriller from the golden era.

 

Chris would demand he play himself and voice Sonichu/others. And let's not forget the ponies...oh lord the ponies

 

I would hope the movie would end where Lil' Trump Sachumo's documentary ends: the house fire. Anything after that isn't very interesting.

 

Track down Liquid Chris and have him play CWC. The meltdown would be unreal

 

I think that Naked Chris is the best Chris, Liquid and Solid are both overrated.

 

Kevin James (Paul Blart) as all of the Jerkops.