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Chris: And make her boobs huge, and dressed in a bikini... its not creepy if I fap to fanart of myself right...?

*creator sends pic of his male self with huge moobs and wearing an unflattering bikini*

 

You know what, that actually might be a good question, theoretical-Chris-voiced-by-Yamcha. Real talk, I'd say it is, but you're technically degrading yourself here, so I dunno. Weird place to be in if you really think about it.

I guess male Chris is pathetic and forgettable in even Chris' eyes.

 

Chris is just more comfortable looking at make believe anime-girl versions of himself. At this point it wouldn't shock me if he honestly thinks he looks like a hot woman. Makes you wonder what goes through his head when he looks in the mirror and is forced to encounter the strange potato-creature that stares back at him.

 

I wonder as well, because he would need to explain that 80-lb. gullet of his, a very unflattering, not-sexy feature no matter who you ask. No, I don't care, anyone that says they're into it is lying. He'd also have to explain the obvious odor, the receding hairline, and the multiplying chin of his, but hey, one thing at a time. But, knowing him, it probably amounts to "NO IZ NAAAAUGHT!!"

 

Sometimes I feel like his delusion might become so powerful it could warp space and time like some anime villain (I'm thinking janemba from DBZ, they're both round ugly babies with attitude problems). That line about people who have jobs are spoiled... chris ascended to a new plane of deluded entitlement there.

 

For a second there I thought you were saying they put in that OC he made up that is proof he had a brain tumor.

 

Hey, look, it's all in his cheddar brain, you'll be fine. But, y'know, if it ever does happen, and anime villainy stuff can happen, just remember that anime hero-ey stuff will be happening too.

Janemba is actually a good comparison here, because of the whole Night Star controlling dimensions thing as of late. Anyway...

Oh, and you gotta also remember. People with jobs are spoiled because they have more money, and therefore can go around doing more of what they want. And people that can do what they want whenever they want it are clearly spoiled, because that's the definition of being spoiled, is doing what you want when you want it, right? That's probably the thought process he followed when he said that.

 

The fat horses with small legs have been absorbed chris

 

That's true. Not that they can't pinch their nose while they speak and get the same response.

 

Malfunction detected. Please restart system.

 

What happens when you put a toddler's vocabulary in a man's body.

 

WHAT

W H A T

W H A T

W H A T

 

I understand chris' ignorance at exercizes, but even he can do a damn Google search before responding to people.

 

Why the fuck can't they wear clothes that cover their stomach?

 

Because they're all plus-sized now, and the world hates body positivity. I guess.

 

or the tugboat in CWCville has been cut down?

 

If the tugboat went down, then I think there would be more signs than small t-shirts on fat people.