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My Autistic Brother

Discussion in 'CWC Discussion' started by TheEnderGecko, Mar 28, 2017.

  1. TheEnderGecko

    TheEnderGecko True and Loyal Sonichu Fan

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    I've been really debating on whether or not I should actually do this.

    I have an autistic brother and I am legitimately scared that he will become like Chris-Chan. He doesn't have an obsession with a video game character, nor does he like to make unironic cringe videos of himself, nor does he even like to draw. The thing that eerily reminds me of Chris-Chan is his ego and sense of entitlement. I don't think that's common in autistic people, so I wanted to ask you guys how to prevent him from being like Chris. I will tell you the whole truth, but I'll change the names of everyone I know that you ask about. I also think it's fair if I refuse to give out certain bits of information as long as I explain why I should.
     
  2. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    Part of me feels like this could be a "power level" moment, but then again, everyone here seems a bit more accepting then at KF.
     
  3. TheEnderGecko

    TheEnderGecko True and Loyal Sonichu Fan

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    What is a Power level moment?
     
  4. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    It was a KF thing. Basically, people revealing "autistic" things about themselves or their family that caused them to get mocked like crazy.

    Ex: "HAI GUYS, I TOTES HAVE A HUGE COLLECTION OF FURY PORN! JUST FYI!"
     
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  5. ShavedSheep

    ShavedSheep Baa!

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    Just don't give out too much unnecessary personal information. You should be okay here. You might get memed on but that probably the worst.
     
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  6. Duhtay Wodes

    Duhtay Wodes The Uh-Mehwican Dwe-yum

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    Exactly. As long as you don't go waaaaaaaaaaaay to much into personal information, I don't see anything negative coming of this.
     
  7. ShavedSheep

    ShavedSheep Baa!

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    Anyways, on topic, I know I'm not really qualified for this but it seems a large part of Chris' problems is a refusal to get professional assistance. This stems from his parents and he had inherited their dogheadedness in this regards. He has also never experienced anything outside of his "safe bubble". He's been in it so long he refuses to even knowledge the world is different. I don't know how old your brother is but if he's younger its probably important he experience the real world as much as possible and working with people who are trained in helping those kinds of individuals if probably helpful too.
     
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  8. TheEnderGecko

    TheEnderGecko True and Loyal Sonichu Fan

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    Just for reference, he is 13 years old. He is in a class with the other Special Education (SpEd) kids. He is still learning to read, which really worries me, because Chris could read when he was 12, and we know that because in order to win the Sonic Sweepstakes, he had to write what Sonic said.

    Also he acts like pretty much anyone he's around, so ever since he started going to school, he started acting like the teachers, starting to try to boss people around, and was even once firmly convinced that he was a teacher and me and my other siblings were students.
     
  9. Aldora

    Aldora Well-Known Member

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    Chris had help and support growing up, what the Chandlers were against was sending Chris away to a facility.

    What your family really needs to do, is to try and ground your brother and his ego. Barb and Bob lets Chris's ego go rampant and look what has happened, I think a lot of the misdeeds that Chris has got up to is because of his behaviour and not his autism.

    I also hope your family take every advantage of anything and everything the state offers you in regards to your brother.
     
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  10. Kong

    Kong SCION OF LEGEND

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    it's never too late to abort.
     
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  11. Foulmouth

    Foulmouth Suck my cock you faggots

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    You should give your brother crack, like,heaps and heaps of crack.
    And make him watch the entire run of HBO's Oz without any sleep because crack.
    And livestream it.
    "My Autistic Brother on Crack Watching Oz" , I'd watch that for sure.
     
  12. Pibot

    Pibot The autist formerly known as Pikonic

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    Imma be real:
    I'm not a doctor.
    I worked with children with special needs, including autistics for 6 years, I've seen the range of "they're getting the best help," and "I'm a terrible parent who doesn't believe in discipline or doctors," I've seen these kids grow up to be college graduates with good jobs, I've seen kids who go work at Walmart or collect trash for their lives (the second is a pretty sweet gig.)I've seen one go to prison. I've seen the whole range, so lemme hit you with some hard truths.
    1.) You are the sibling of an autistic, your mother is the mother of an autistic, your father is... you get the point.
    You guys are not autism specialists.
    You guys are not autism experts.
    Being related to an autistic doesn't give you an 8-year degree. I cannot tell you how many times I've heard "The specialist was wrong." Or "The doctor doesn't know my child." Listen to your brother's doctor/therapist. They're going to suggest things your brother doesn't like, they're going to suggest things your family might not like. You can't pick and choose what the doctor says and do only what you like.
    2.) Tell the therapist everything. "I'm concerned my brother has an ego problem because he does X,Y,Z" is better than "He has an ego problem." They're going to explain to your brother that he needs to listen to other people and he's not the boss. He's going to hate it and probably isn't going to want to go.
    I've heard it before "[Child] didn't like her therapist so we stopped going."
    3.) Be involved. You can't plop the kid into a therapy room and expect everything to be great. Talk to the therapist about what you can do to make sure the therapy practices actually stick.
     
  13. Birdoj

    Birdoj bird but in esperanto

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    Yeah honestly the best thing your family can do is get him help. I'm glad he's already got an IEP and doing stuff in school but outside therapy can be good, too.
    Autism is different for everyone. It's a spectrum, so on one end there's people who just really like trains (aka Asperger's) and on the other are people who can never take care of themselves and have to live in a facility. Chris is "high-functioning" in that he's able to "function" in the real world: he can hold down a job (if people made him), he can drive a car, he can cook for himself, he can bath/go to the bathroom/do laundry etc etc. He's not doing the BEST job at these things, but he's doing them. So your brother and what he's going through will never be the same as Chris or any other autistic person you might know.
    Do what you can to learn about it and help your parents out. Your brother is also 13 and dealing with HORMONES and all the BS that puts you through; I'm sure you remember how sucky that was even with a "normal" mind. The other kids in his school are probably dicks to him. It's also possible he's just an asshole because, again, he's 13. In all likelihood he'll be fine, just make him go to therapy and follow what the docs say.
     
  14. TheEnderGecko

    TheEnderGecko True and Loyal Sonichu Fan

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    We've been trying to keep his ego in check to the point of him seeming to recognize he's not an authority, but he still tries to tell people what to do.
    Some years ago, my parents would have him go to speech therapy (I think that's what it was called...I'm not sure) at a local children's hospital. I don't remember why, but my parents eventually stopped taking him. After a while they eventually had a guy come over and talk to him. I never really stuck around to listen. These were both several years ago, and I think there may have been a difference in his behavior, but I'm just not sure.
     
  15. Deleted User 0007

    Deleted User 0007 Well-Known Member

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    Honestly, I think Chris chan would be a good horror story for him to get motivated and succeed at life.
    Or the doctor thing, you could try that too.
     
  16. Minimal Effort

    Minimal Effort Bring out your dead.

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    Could not have said it better myself.
     
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  17. king kong... with wings?

    king kong... with wings? Snek doesn't like being manhandled

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    Getting him to a psychologist (perhaps even a behavior therapist instead) and listening to said professional is a good step, challenging his ego when it seems irrational is my other suggestion. I am not a psychologist, but i am willing to offer what i think could work since it helps me
     
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  18. Trefoil Knot

    Trefoil Knot < x,y | x² = y³ >

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    I don't have anything to add other than a million years ago I was a public school teacher and I interacted with a lot of "at risk" students ("at risk" basically means anyone who is probably going to do poorly in school). And my mom was a Special Education teacher for a long time. This doesn't make me any kind of expert it just gives me some anecdotes.

    The short, short version of all I can say is: The destinies of kids with special needs (whatever type) is tightly joined with the values of those tasked with their care. Sped students from households with a strong personal responsibility ethic (both for themselves in considering themselves to have a moral duty to help, and in terms of making the special education student feel like they were responsible too) produced people who, although limited by their disabilities, went on to be functional adults. Granted none of these people turned out to be scientists or to have very prestigious jobs, but the fact is they turned out to be people who actually have jobs, their own apartment, their own car in some cases, friends, social circles, hobbies and surprisingly diverse interests. In short, a lot of these people turned out to be functional human beings in concept just not in scale.

    Sure a few were obsessed with goofy kid shit, but they also liked some more "adult" things too such as a certain kind of music. I actually came to admire one young man in particular who was very cognitively limited (the guy literally could not tie his own shoes), but who took great pains to do everything he could with the capabilities he did have. Seriously this guy who was a charity case himself volunteered to help homeless people because "some people aren't as fortunate as I am". I also noticed that these former students who accomplished even humble things like holding down a menial job were just happier, better people who had a sense of self-worth that nothing else could duplicate.

    It's the lot where A) nobody gave a damn about them or B) the people tasked with their care were severely lacking in character themselves (being lazy, not believing they had to prepare their child for the cold, cruel world) where I saw human disasters that were never Chris-Chan bad, but it was still a waste of their potential as people.

    TL;DR - I think you have to treat people like that is if ten years from now, their family, welfare programs, etc. are all going to vanish and you have to prepare them to somehow thrive as if they truly are to just be left on their own. Understanding as much as you can about their limitations and knowing their personality puts you in a good position to prime someone like this for success on his own terms. Pretending they don't have a disability is wrong, but not doing everything you can to get them to learn to cope with it is also wrong.
     
  19. ICanFeelTheCosmos0704

    ICanFeelTheCosmos0704 friend of little cat

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    People have already said the basics - make sure he's going to therapy and following through on his obligations, remember he's only 13 so he might grow out of it, work with the teachers to make sure he's learning essential academic skills. Try to work on his strengths so he doesn't just feel like a loser with autism - for example, if he likes to draw, get him some nice art supplies and find a way for him to improve at his hobby.
    Also realize while he may be 13 chronologically he may only be 6 when it comes to emotions or social interactions - that may be hard to accept but it might be true.
    This goes without saying - make sure his internet activity is strictly monitored so he doesn't end up like Chris and other people with autism who made a fool of themselves online and didn't know what they did wrong.
     
  20. Princess Celestia

    Princess Celestia Your local techni-color horse.

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    The main reason why Chris is the way he is that he's allowed to be. Even if Chris was born without Autism his life would still have been a train wreck, just not the kind that has forums erected in honor of his life failures. I'm not autistic but when I was little I had pretty severe dyslexia. The School was small and didn't really have a special ed program so they decided to just set lower standards for me. During the entire time this happened I never made much progress. Then my third grade teacher wouldn't put up with that crap and said I had to do what everyone else did. By the end of the year I was able to read Books at an eighth grade level.

    Point is that if you let him use his Autism as an excuse or tell him that hes special he probably won't get any better. I'm sure that Chris is the way he is simply because people told him he was a special little boy and everything he did was amazing. If you take your brother to therapists they will tell you the same thing. You and your family are going to have to have to expect things of him if you want him to develop.
     
    Last edited: Mar 28, 2017