FB 2/5 - Chris's gay anthem

Here are the lyrics to that song, with Romeo replaced with lesbian Juliet:

Spoiler

We were both young when I first saw you.
I close my eyes and the flashback starts:
I'm standing there on a balcony in summer air.

See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns.
See you make your way through the crowd
And say, "Hello."
Little did I know...

That you were lesbian Juliet, you were throwing pebbles,
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."
And I was crying on the staircase
Begging you, "Please don't go."
And I said...

lesbian Juliet, take me somewhere we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all that's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess,
It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes".

So I sneak out to the garden to see you.
We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they knew
So close your eyes,
Escape this town for a little while.
Oh, oh.

'Cause you were lesbian Juliet, I was a scarlet letter,
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."
But you were everything to me,
I was begging you, "Please don't go."
And I said...

lesbian Juliet, take me somewhere we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all that's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess.
It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes".

lesbian Juliet, save me. They're trying to tell me how to feel.
This love is difficult but it's real.
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess.
It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes".

Oh, oh, oh.

I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around.
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town.
And I said...

lesbian Juliet, save me. I've been feeling so alone.
I keep waiting for you, but you never come.
Is this in my head? I don't know what to think.
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said...

Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone.
I love you, and that's all I really know.
I talked to your dad – go pick out a white dress
It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes".

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

'Cause we were both young when I first saw you

 

Chris' very own closeted gay anthem:

 

Chris is unusually busy today!

 

Chris sperging about the lesbians he will never have

look at my shocked face

 

Reminds me of this

 

Well if no one is gonna make the joke I guess I will,

Spoiler: Bad joke

Spoiler: No really, bad joke

Spoiler: Low hanging fruit here.

Spoiler: You've been warned

JULAYet

 

Juliet and Juliet? Original.

 

I wish the word "lesbian" or anything involving LGBT community were stripped from his vocabulary.

 

"LESBIAN Juliet." Cause Chris needs to make that clear that the other Juliet is a carpet muncher.

Why not just come up with another female name, Chris? Like a female version of Romeo, like Romina, or just Romi?

Oh wait, because Chris has zero originality

 

Yup.

 

Introducing Juliet Rosechu.

 

Remember that in the original story juliet fukin died

 

She's also 13/14. Curse those 'dumb laws'.
Then again it's extremely likely that Chris's only exposure to the play is through the movie and references in cartoons so chances are when he hears 'Juliet' he imagines Lois Griffin in a ballgown or some shit.

 

It wouldn't surprise me at all if Chris doesn't know that Romeo and Juliet died at the end of the play. He probably thinks they lived happily ever after, Romeo becomes female souled Romi, and Juliet works while Romi plays lego all day.

 

You guys DO remember that "Jackie's" last name is Romy, right? Makes this a thousand times funnier.

 

Just making sure, Chris...it's Juliet and not Sailor Moon?